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I swear recently, I’ve talked about politics more than anything else, at home at least. It’s probably because of the upcoming general election. Well, one of the hottest topics right now is Gay Rights. I was surprised to hear David Cameron saying how “We do need good sex and relationship education. That education should teach people about equality, that we treat people the same whether they are gay or straight, I think that is really important that we embed that in the ethos of our education.”

Well, okay. That’s a good start. I was extremely impressed – I mean, a party which wears its heart on its sleeve (read: Conservative) has suddenly changed its tune rather dramatically. For a little while there, I debated voting Tory. Needless to say, that didn’t last long. Cameron has just quickly backtracked and, despite there being the ‘LGBTory’ branch, and is even refusing to accept homophobic bullying as an occurrence:

“He says he doesn’t understand why homophobia would be worse in faith schools. But I ask: Is it so odd? Some of these religious groups – not all – believe homosexuality is a sin. For the only time in the interview, Cameron looks irritated. “That’s so wrong,” he snaps, his brow furrowed. “My daughter goes to a church school and it’s not like that.” He angrily says, “A lot of what you’ve read in the newspapers is actually a lot of tosh.” With a firm glare, he says he will put in place “ground rules” to make sure new religious schools “teach equality”, and that’s that. He gets up to turn down the radiator next to him. “ (http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/lets-talk-about-sex-johann-hari-grills-david-cameron-over-gay-rights-1888688.html)

Uh-huh. I see. Just read the article. You’ll see that Cameron is trying is hardest to be seen as fair and modern, but he just can’t shake his own beliefs, it would seem. 30% of David Cameron’s cabinet have voted against gay rights, including the repeal of Section 28 (which Cameron himself voted against), adoption by gay parents and lowering the age of consent for gay men. Which brings me nicely to Labour, where NO party members voted against any of these laws.

I’m not defending the Labour party, or Gordon Brown for that matter. But don’t forget that they did bring us the Civil Partnerships. No, it’s not quite marriage, but you have to admit that it’s a big step in the right direction. Labour’s LGBT group also seems to be a driving force behind passing a law against homophic hatred, which the Conservatives House of Lords have constantly been opposing. That having been said, other than their promised extension of the Equality Bill, there are no other remarks about homosexuality. I guess you could that settling, a compromise.

The Liberal Democrats, however, seem to be living up to their name. The Independent recently published details of a political conference, in which Lib Dem leader Nick Clegg made some bold statements and drilled Cameron into the ground. Clegg stated that he ensure that schoolchildren are brought up knowing that homosexuality is normal, and gay relationships (sexual and romantic) would be discussed in lessons. Also, he Clegg would ensure that homophobic crime is recognised and treated the same way as any sort of hatred or discrimination. PLUS, he would finally equalise all orientations. Gay men and women would be able to get MARRIED, and would have all of the same rights and benefits etc etc. I emailed Clegg’s office about why none of his more recent statements are on the party’s website and I received a satisfactory reply. I’m hoping to see this information on their page very soon indeed.

I’m about to turn twenty, and so I’ve been doing a lot of research into this as it will be the first time that I’ve voted in a general election. Unfortunately, the Liberal Democrats are unlikely to succeed – it’s neck-and-neck between the Tories and the BNP. I know that gay rights is not the only thing that I should be looking at when deciding on who to vote for, but people need to choose a party that speaks to them, that will do what they want. The Lib Dems haven’t been in power for a very long time (most likely because people always switch between only Labour and Conservative). Perhaps we ought to allow these lads to muck about in Number 10 for a while. If they don’t get voted in, then I’ll just have turn into a renegade Parliamentary candidate.

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Lectori Salutem! or L.S. (Greetings to the Reader!)

Sometimes it’s joked about in the Lesbian community that all we need is our dogs or cats, and a woman just becomes the icing on the cake. Well certainly compared to the heterosexual community, the GLBT community takes pet ownership to a whole new level. This should come as no surprise to anyone. I was really just trying to find some statistics to back up the story I wanted to tell.

83% of lesbians have a pet!!!!! What a shocker!!! And drum roll please…. 60% of lesbians have dogs! To round out the statistics, 61% of gay men have pets and 38% of gay men have dogs. As for cats, there is some overlap with lesbians which of course is too be expected as I know you all know friends who have dogs and a cat or two. So, 28% of gay men have cats and 51% of lesbians of cats. That means only 13% of gay women, according to this study at least, do not own dogs!

OK, OK, now that I have established what I already knew, on to the subject at hand, the immense bond we form with our pets. This bond is universal and open to anyone who gives their dog love and devotion but I am going to focus on the unique bond of a lesbian and her dog, at least from the lesbian’s perspective.

I have countless friends that go to the ends of the earth to spend time with their dog after a bad break up where the dog is collateral damage. The love of a dog is something inexplicable. I still can recall the pain of losing my first dog, Otto, named for the Sarge’s dog in the Beetle Bailey comic strip. That dog raised me from three until I was twenty years old. He took all the tail pulling of a baby girl and the spankings of a girl forcing him to play baby and he did it all so willingly. He was a miracle dog.

He survived a pix ax to the stomach. My dad was trying to kill a rattlesnake in our back yard in La Jolla and Otto ran after the snake because he thought it was going to strike my dad just as the ax came down. He survived a poising in our watermelon patch, same house. My mom put out pesticide to kill the ladybugs that were eating our watermelon leaves and Otto ate and it was off to emergency again. He had many other close calls and ER trips but once I was raised the poor dog hated children and would growl if they came near him. I guess he felt he had done his job with my brother and I but never again!!!!

As an adult I remember it never occurred to me I could have my own dog for a long, long time. I lived in apartments and moved a lot and it just never seemed possible. Then eleven years ago I saw a man with a miniature dachshund and it all clicked. I am stable living wise. I am not moving anymore. He’s the perfect size. I got one within the week. Now, all these years later I have three. One was a foster, 14, one is a champion and a crazy bastard, 3, and then the original who just turned 11.

I am a lesbian dog owner and all that it entails. They have gotten me through more drama, rough patches, depressions, grounded me during the elations, been a source to pick up chicks when need be, (hell, I’m not too proud to admit it), but most of all they are my constant, my truth, waiting, happily always waiting for me to come home and talk, yell, scream, comfort, anything I want or need and they are there.

It is not that these dogs are human as it is one of my pet peeves when someone starts to anthropomorphize a dog. A dog has plenty of great qualities in his own right but he is not a human being! Dogs lick their balls, eat shit and enjoy it, and love with the strength no human could muster even after you’ve yelled at them at the top of your lungs for peeing on the carpet or accidentally breaking a valuable piece of Venetian glass. No human I know or have ever seen reacts like that so just let the animal live its dog life.

Having said that, they are an animal with keen senses and emotional centers and definitely feel when I am sad or sick, happy or mad. Not in ways a human would know and not always quickly but when I come home from the hospital, there is a quiet, they hold it as long as they can so I only have to take them out once or twice a day instead of four times. If I am crying they snuggle in as close to me as they can and the youngest who hasn’t yet learned the etiquette I have taught my older two is wagging his tail with his whole body wriggling in my face, licking my tears so eager to make it all better that he does by making me laugh.

With all these wonderful qualities we share with our animals, we love them as if they were part of us until they are part of us, forgetting we will always outlive them. Then those days come and our worlds crumble from sorrow as we have lost a piece of our soul.

A friend of mine had to let her dog go on Friday and that is what sparked this blog in the first place. Once I started the trip, however, it took me to unopened pockets in my own history that needed some airing out. The past sometimes needs a good dusting off when the memories are lovely to look at and your sense of smell still keen.

I lost a dog way before his time due to my own negligence and his death is still a fresh wound so I’ll share it to help the healing process. I was gone all day shopping and did not put all my medication bottles completely out of his reach. He hadn’t shown an interest in them before, nor did any of the dogs but this day he did and his ate an entire bottle of prescription pain pills. By the time we got back from shopping he was still alive but barely. I called the vet and he said because of his body temperature it was too late to do anything. Just hold him. So I did and he died two and a half hours later.

I am sure everyone who has lost a loving pet knows that feeling of loss. Let’s all just think about St. Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals, for my friend tonight and if your Christian please read the Prayer to The Animals that is in the Quote For The Day.

Much Love.

Inspired By Sappho’s Muse

MUSIC OF THE DAY
Since this is a blog of contemplation on woman’s best friend and the bond that dogs hold in our lives, I am going to pick A Bridge Over Troubled Water as sung by the amazing Charlotte Church. This is one of the most beautiful recordings of this song I have ever heard. The second is a symbol of the friendship we develop with our trusted pets. It’s James Taylor’s You’ve Got A Friend. It is especially poignant in the line “you just call out my name and you know wherever I am, I’ll come running”, because isn’t that exactly what our dogs do? The music can only be heard at the original website.

A Bridge Over Troubled Water  Charlotte Church
You’ve Got A Friend                  James Taylor

QUOTE OF THE DAY
Blessed are you, Lord God, maker of all living creatures. You called forth fish in the sea, birds in the air and animals on the land. You inspired St. Francis to call all of them his brothers and sisters. We ask you to bless this pet. By the power of your love, enable it to live according to your plan. May we always praise you for all your beauty in creation. Blessed are you, Lord our God, in all your creatures! Amen
St. Frances of Assisi

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Valentine’s Day is fast approaching. The best thing Valentine’s Day has over Christmas is that it’s a private holiday, so if you have a partner, the gift you give them won’t be opened in front of their sleepy pajama-ed family on Christmas morning. This leaves you room to get them something you’ll both enjoy, if you catch my drift.

It’s a really good idea, and it is increasing in popularity with the struggling economy. Why is that? Because sensual gifts fill many roles all at once. It’s a gift, it’s an invitation to play, it’s a luxury, and you can have fun using it with your partner time and time again, at home, with the lights low (or high!) instead of going out somewhere and spending money for an afternoon/evening/weekend of fun.

SINGLE PEOPLE! Treat yourself this Single’s Awareness Day and have some quality time at home with yourself. You’ll thank you for it!

Tunti Enterprises is promoting a Valentine’s Day gift package sold through the Kama Sutra Closet. Why should you check this out? Well, aside from each gift package featuring the discreet and handy Tunti Illuminating Boudoir Box, which I love, they come pre-stocked with some incredible toys. One of them even features the incredible jimmyjane Form 2, which I covet. Bunny ears with a motor in each? Yes, please. Follow me through the link for details of the available packages and how much you save with each kit! Be sure to read to the end to see how you can win a Tunti Toybox of your very own!

Think you’re too late? Think again. THERE’S STILL TIME!

USPS Priority 2-3 Day Shipping is free with all orders within the U.S.!

Order now to get it in time for Valentine’s Day!

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What Would Sappho Say?

Lectori Salutem! or L.S. (Greetings to the Reader!)

As an insomniac, I started staying up later and later at night until it just became a part of my life. Now, even when a get a descent night’s sleep that starts at about 1 AM and goes until 8 AM or so. That said, if I have had a string of late nights and early mornings, I know I should not be operating heavy machinery and that if I produce some writing, some heavy editing will be required later in the day.

The rub of it is, while a night owl, I also am not able to sleep in either. I have animals that wake me up at 6 AM sharp for their feeding and if I happen to fall back asleep after feeding them, they all too eagerly re-awaken me with a thunderous round of three dachshunds barking to go out for their walk. It is usually after this point that I am up for the day. Now, I didn’t say what condition I am in but I am mobile and that first cigarette of the day hits my lungs like the breath of fresh air only another smoker would understand giving me just enough of a kick to push me towards the bathroom to brush my teeth, wash my face and on a good day apply the golden cream of youth my dermatologist gave me for a skin disorder that actually is now being bartered on the black market because of its profound effects on women’s skin and wrinkles.

Little did I know I had over $1000 worth of hot product just a few feet from me in a drawer that I hardly used. Good Sappho has been kind to me so far and I have not a wrinkle on my face… yet. So, I use these tubes to make my friends happy and try to convince them to stay away from botox for a few more years instead of going down to the plastic surgery area of our town and peddling them out of a big purse. If money gets any tighter, well we’ll see..

Back to the night, there is so much I love about working through the night hours. I live is a busy downtown area during the day but at night the streets run silent. After midnight I can take my dogs out without their leashes on and they behave well enough to know to stay near me, not to run into the road, and they get a little bit of freedom from the daily grind of going in circles, one behind the other.

There is something so peaceful to me in knowing I am one of the few awake as others around me sleep. The homeless that hang on my street know me pretty well after three and a half years, especially as conspicuous as I am with three miniature dachshunds trailing behind but over time we have come to a mutual understanding about asking for money. They know I will help them out, but not too often and only after I get paid. Most of the time it is just a “hi, Miss, how are ya doing tonight?” and I know they have my back out here on the streets.

In the best of this little midnight world is the convenience store that sits right across the street for my 24 hour guilty pleasures. It is not good on my waistline or my pocketbook but it sure makes me happy to know that on a whim I can run across the street and get almost anything I need or want at 2 AM.

Most of my work is done from 9 PM to 2 AM and from 9 AM to 2 PM. Those are my biggest work spurts and that is a strange thing to find in one person. I am the most worthless in the middle of the afternoon and that is when I have to get all of my non-writing related work done like grocery shopping and house cleaning. Let’s just say I grocery shop once every two weeks and try to keep the house clean on a daily basis so there is never that HOUSE CLEANING DAY.

No. This lady lives for the night and I was recently told by an authority figure (not mine, thank Sappho) that those of us that still choose to work at night against the grain of what society does are simply stuck in a childish rebellion. To her I say, “Billy Idol” and for those of you who don’t get the reference it is one of the songs of the day. Listen to it and you will understand.

I am certainly not trying to buck society, I live in society, I am trying to write to society… I JUST DON’T GET MUCH SLEEP! I write when the muse inspires me and sometimes even when she doesn’t so I can learn how to grow s a writer.

I know plenty of people who live under the night sky for their job, or because of insomnia issues and creativity issues like me, and some just by choice and I don’t think any of the ones I know are still trying to hold on to that old idea of rebelling against something or someone as an attention seeking mechanism.

WE JUST ARE THE NIGHT.

Much Love.

Inspired By Sappho’s Muse

QUOTE OF THE DAY
A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.
Oscar Wilde

Night brings our troubles to the light, rather than banishes them.
Seneca

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Lectori Salutem! or L.S. (Greetings to the Reader!)

Ridiculous was one of my favorite words to use for years and years and one day “poof” out of nowhere, the word was ruined for me. How you may ask? My best friend at the time just had to tell me a story about and her girlfriend and herself having a disagreement when my friend used the word RIDICULOUS. Now I do have to concur with a teeny, teeny, tiny bit of the sentiment in the following statement but I love the word too so it never bothered me in the least. The girlfriend stopped the car and blew up at her, “Why do you always have to use the word ridiculous? There’s so much emphasis in your voice when you use it. It drives me nuts. I HATE THAT WORD. Why cant you just say stupid like everyone else does?”

Well, I never liked this woman and after hearing this story every time I would use the word it would get stuck in my throat, no longer running of the tongue with the pleasure it once had. Even six months after the story, every time this word came into my vocabulary I would think of this REDICULOUS, INANE, ASININE woman I disliked and it took all the pleasure out of using the word itself. So, I decided I needed to attach a new back-story to the word to replace my image of this woman. So I sat down with pen in hand….

I wrote a poem (possibly lyrics to a song for any of you musician types out there) using the word about to describe a relationship, a woman, someone like one of the four crazy women I had met in the last year as chronicled in the Crazy Women blog, could it be? I’ll never tell. All I know is I can say my word in peace now.

So don’t be too hard on me on this one…. It’s my first foray into poetry or lyrics and it was all done in service to a word as they mean so much to me.

Here’s… REDICULOUS

I met her long before I knew better;
That youth before age was for the foolish.
She pulled me in with what seemed was a secret charm.
I go back and do it again if I had my wish.

Flowing from my mouth was the word ridiculous.
The way it ran off my tongue had a certain chime.
Didn’t know the sound was so serious.
Until I said it all the time.

It’s just ridiculous…
Absurd, inane and ludicrous.
Playing with the fire of her raw days.
She was just a little plaything.
Sophmoric games and dodging answers were her way.

Our conversations always stopped when in came meaning.
As long as I got mine I didn’t care how crazy it got.
I don’t think she knew how she was seeming.
I thought she could handle casual, clearly not.

It’s just ridiculous…
Absurd, inane, and ludicrous.
Playing with the fire of her raw days.
She was just a little plaything.
Sophmoric games and dodging answers were her way.

As you ask yourself why, get in the line behind me.
It wasn’t sex ‘cause that sure wasn’t free.
Just a pet project I guess I’ll call ridiculous.
And now she won’t just let me be.

I said it was ridiculous.
Absurd, inane, and ludicrous.
Playing with the fire of her raw days.
She was just a little plaything.
Now I’m the one with the price to pay.

Not bad for a first effort if I do say so myself. What do you guys think? Give me some feedback. To leave comments you must go to the actual page this blog is written on by clicking its name in the top right list, then post away/

Well, peace out. Go easy on yourselves and me!

Much Love.

Inspired by Sappho’s Muse

MUSIC OF THE DAY
Let’s go with the theme of the poem and play Patrice Pike’s Ridiculous Mess. The second song is a from the one and only Adam Lambert who is burning up the charts with his second released song from his debut album For Your Entertainment called Whatya Want From Me.

Ridiculous Mess Patrice Pike
Whatya Want From Me Adam Lambert

QUOTE OF THE DAY
Doubt is uncomfortable, certainty is ridiculous.
Voltaire

All great deeds and all great thoughts have a ridiculous beginning.
Albert Camus

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Lectori Salutem! or L.S. (Greetings to the Reader!)

Well, it seems to be that time of the month again(in a good way) and I am itching to share with you my newest erotica that takes the reader to a place of highened senses and dare I say an X-rating from the censor boards if there were such a thind in cyber space. Once again, my greatest concern is to keep from getting the entire site deemed pornographic in nature, so I have attached these files as I have done all the others with a stern warning that those under 18 in this case should not be viewing this material without parental consent and do solelmly swear by downloading the material they are born after January 29, 1992.

SO… first off, the warning. The following file is for adults over the age of 18 as the material is Rated X in nature and no one under that age should be viewing this material without consulting with their parents. Please don’t do anything foolish to get me in trouble. I’m having enough trouble with readership the last thing I need it an adult warning sticker to get through before you even get to my site!!! SO, the following narrative is called The Perfect Storm and I guess it will have to fend for itself from here on in. Just click on the title of story below and tap your heels together or your Doc Martens, your preference, and we’ll be off the races.

Download The Perfect Storm…

Whew!! That’s a relief! Now for those of you that enjoy this story and did not get a chance to read the second one, I am re-releasing it now in the text of this blog, It came originally from the blog by the same title, Sunday Comes Too Soon. So download the story Sunday Comes Too Soon directly as it is a completely different tale than this. The blog was released on Thursday, January 7th so you won’t have to go digging to find it as I have learned even one extra click of the mouse loses you your readers. The first erotic story can be downloaded embedded in the blog The Music of Duets. or directly. It is called The House of Cards.

I haven’t written much this week but I have been plagued with doctor’s and dentist’s appointments and they all seemed to somehow originate from hell. Plus, my social life took an unexpected turn Tuesday night that I can’t even share with you my gentle readers YET. All I can say is that it was fun and most likely will occur again. You just never know with these things. I’m still single and have obviously still got a lot of unexpected twists and turns still ahead of me which makes me smile like the cheshire cat who just ate the mouse. Live life to the fullest people because you never know what is behind doors numbered 1, 2, or 3 and if you just say “yes” all three doors may open simultaneously.

Maybe when this whole thing blows over I will begin to tell the tale, who knows? Some things are yours and yours alone. This is one those things that makes you walk around with a shit-eating grin on your face but you can never eally explain why without hurting the other people involved it seems. I had a long evening on Tuesday night and you never know if a different peformance may be in order some time soon.

Well let’s get to it. Here is the new story again. The following story is not suitable for ANYONE under the age of eighteen. Do not download if you were born after Jan 29, 1992 without parental consent.

Download The Perfect Storm…

Well, I’m going to stop for now and let the story hold it’s own. Hope the year is treating you right and please let me know if you like the story. Feedback is greatly appreciated. To post a comment, merely go to the actual page of this blog which is the named page in the upper right hand corner where the blogs are listed by date. Click on the name of this blog and the page will appear again with a comment box at the bottom and you can tell me what you really feel.

Much love.

Inspired by Sappho’s Muse.

MUSIC OF THE DAY
Since we are in the mood for a little erotica and sex, today’s music will be Madonna’s Erotica and Justin Timberlake’s Sexy Back.

Madonna              Erotica
Justin Timberlake  Sexy Back

QUOTE OF THE DAY
A woman’s appetite is twice that of a man’s; her sexual desire, four times; her intelligence, eight times.
Anonymous

Sex is more than an act of pleasure, its’ the ability to be able to feel so close to a person, so connected, so comfortable that it’s almost breathtaking to the point you feel you can’t take it. And at this moment you’re a part of them.
Anonymous

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I’m not a big fan of mid-week drinking. Especially when I missed every single college class this week, and am supposed to be up at 7am the following morning in a feeble attempt to improve my attendance. No, getting absolutely slaughtered on Wednesday night is not really a) a good idea, or b) my idea of fun.

So there I was, 9:30pm, sat in my usual pub with J. We’d racked up a decent amount of empty beer bottles and were now onto the spirits with mixers. Her friends had long since departed so we had each other, our drinks, the football, and a large room of guys hunting for fresh meat. Anyway, you know how it is. It’s night. The pub is playing good music, there’s an abundance of booze at the bar as well as in your systems. You have a cosy sofa to yourselves. Oh, and that weird pub quiz machine that house both Chris Tarrant and Noel Edmunds. Of course we had been flirting. J is a very beautiful girl. We kissed shortly before my last bus home – I, uh, never quite made it to the bus stop on time. Sorry, mum(!). We carry on drinking and making out and I couldn’t believe how comfortable I felt. I’m out to J and to the internet. My friends from college I don’t know well enough at all to feel the need to divulge that information. As for my parents, I’ll tell them when I’m ready and when I feel the need to. The latter part means with a girl on my arm.

Comfy sofa, by the window, full view of everyone. I thought I would feel nervous or embarrassed. I honestly thought that I would find it really awkward, I’m aware it could have been the alcohol, but I’m not convinced. We eventually made our way to another pub. A gay bar, to be exact, where J sang a drunken but wonderful rendition of Madonna’s ‘Crazy For You’. I also have a vague recollection of us deciding to get matching tattoos and get married, but that definitely WAS the rum talking! Cue venue number three, a virtually empty club where we both ended up dancing with some other girl because her friends were being boring. Again, I felt so relaxed and sure of myself. We danced like total idiots, I’m sure.

It must have been around 3am by the time we made it back to her place. Don’t worry, it was perfectly innocent. We were both so drunk and tired that we barely made it up the stairs. And it’s so much better waking up to a beautiful girl rather than some guy’s boner digging into your thigh. Well, in my opinion anyway.

Oh, I never did make it to college the next day, either.

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After years of participating wholeheartedly in the rat-race, raising children, seeing them off to university and contemplating another 20 odd years of ploughing the same 9-5 furrow, the opportunity to escape seemed too good to miss.

Susanne and I had embarked on the adventure of acquiring a holiday villa in Spain some 7 years earlier (and it truly was an adventure … but that’s another story!). Our villa was a place to enjoy holidays with the kids but never a home. But we always loved Spain. Not the costas, where the Brits and other northern Europeans enjoy their annual two weeks in the cultural no-go-zone of a package holiday. But the real Spain. And yet just as close to the airport and beaches as any of the package destinations. Iznate is a charming quintessentially Andalucian white village. The locals expect us to learn Spanish and not the reverse. It’s not as sophisticated as Britain, that is if our rat-racey lives can truly be called sophisticated. Their main occupation is farming – traditionally raisins, used to make a divine brew called Malaga Dulce. Increasingly the land is being turned over to avocados and mangos – perhaps things are getting a little more sophisticated! – but it’s still farming all the same.

And the seaside towns around here are a million miles away from Marbella or Torremolinos. They don’t appear in any package-holiday brochure. These places are where the Spanish come on holiday. And boy do they know how to enjoy themselves ! It all seems to revolve around eating!
Andalucia doesn’t just have amazing weather (all year round). It is also blessed with stunning scenery – mountain range after mountain range, tailing off into the sea. It is drop dead beautiful. And then there is the culture, the history.

This place was seriously important in the history of Europe, Christianity, Islam and even Judaism. Living here, being able to imbibe the history of Andalucia is intoxicating. Andalucia’s four great cities are right up there in the ranks of all the great cities of Europe. Seville’s Alcazar and Giralda are stunning. Cordoba was once the largest city in Europe and a hotbed for scholarship, noted for its tolerance across all religious groups. Granada, the last stand of the Moors, is home to the most celebrated Muslim palace in the world. And Malaga City has its share of delights, with its Roman Ampitheatre, Alcazaba and Gibralfaro, not to mention its more recent claim to fame as the birthplace of Picasso.

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Lectori Salutem! or L.S. (Greetings to the Reader!)

For the first time I am going to ask you to go listen to the one and only song available on today’s website and it’s by up and coming artist Kate Voegele off her first album called WISH YOU WERE. I had already been thinking of this phenomena since I had written about social chameleons and how insidious they are. When talking to my friends, I realized that it didn’t take a chameleon or any special powers at all to make us idealize the person we are with, especially those doomed relationships that leave us scratching our head, wondering why we want her back in our life so badly when the reality of her does not mesh with the vision in our heads.

A lot happens over the course of a year or 6 months, especially if you have convinced yourself that love is in the air. The beautiful, smart, funny, artist with so much talent had you backing her in every way as she put together pieces for a showing. It took awhile to realize that the only art you were going to see done by her had been completed in the distant past and the gallery showing was a pipe dream intended to draw your enthusiasm and financial support on each and every date you ever went on. She was the starving artist. IN your mind she had become so much more.

Since you had worked hard for your dreams, you had created a life for the both of you where her creativity was met with critical success and the two of you thought of moving in together somewhere after year one. Maybe a real artist’s loft for the both of you to express your talents, you at a desk, she at an easel – you could picture the both of you in your mind’s eye. Where on earth did these images come from?

Not once had you seen her brush in hand or heard her brainstorming an idea for a piece of art. It was a daily bitch fest of how hard life was as an office manager (she had a great gay boss with cushy hours and great benefits) and how she just couldn’t muster the energy for her art. Why, oh why was this never the accurate picture that came into your mind as you thought of her and the sadness you felt once she was extricated from your life. The worse part would be that she would leave you for being too supportive and putting pressure on her to create when she just wasn’t ready to move in that direction. She needed someone more laid back than you. Ouch!

Now that she was gone, you just knew if you had given her more space to be her authentic self, the two of you might have had that loft in midtown. God woman! Open your eyes! This woman is a waste of space in your life plan and projecting on her the attributes of the person you really want to be with only prolongs the agony. God, I have heard this story around the lesbian water cooler for years and watched it happen to so many of my friends. For me, that infatuation love happened only in my younger years but it follows many to their grave.

How many times have some of you said to yourselves the lines in this song, “I’ve seen your act and I know all the facts. I’m still in love with who I wish you were. It ain’t hard to see who you are underneath. I’m still in love with who I wish you were. I wish you were here.”

The truth is, I really can’t say it any better or more eloquent than the simple lyrics of this perfect little song, WISH YOU WERE. So beware of what your heart sees, especially in those early stages of love (cause sometimes you ain’t in love with her but a figment of your imagination) and also when it has been freshly broken. It is in these times it sees through optical glass and life should have a warning that “images are not as they appear”. Take care of yourselves and try to see everything as 20/20.

Much Love.

Inspired by Sappho

MUSIC OF THE DAY
As I said, today is going to be a great up and coming singer and I am going to treat you with two versions of the same song, one full band and the other acoustic. Of course as I said, it is called Wish You Were.

Wish You Were Kate Voegele
Wish You Were (Acoustic) Kate Voegele

QUOTE OF THE DAY
Have you ever been in love? Horrible, isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life… You give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside of you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phase like ‘maybe we should just be friends’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul hurt, a real get’s-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.
Neil Galman

Hot:

Some of you have asked if I currently have a life-partner. I do, I actually have a wife….we were married in Dana Point, California on October 3, 2008. We are two of the 18,000 queer people who are legally married in California, having married during a brief time of legality before the passing of Proposition 8.

Prop 8 made marriage between same-sex couples illegal again after its passage. A federal court is now hearing constitutional arguments about the validity of the California law. The case will make its way to the United States Supreme Court and eventually we will get a definitive decision.

I have to admit an evil plan. I chose to write about this today in the first stages of my blog’s evolution. I wanted to try and show the reader that I am a real person first. I wanted to be Sally Field and have you like me before I got to this subject.

I take the risk of turning some off, and losing them as fans of my blog. Please do me the favor of finishing this piece before you make your decision. If I lose you…so be it. I cannot change who I am …nor would I choose to do so. Hell, there are members of my family that wouldn’t read this blog because I am queer.

Imagine what you would feel like if strangers were deciding if you could marry the person you loved? Americans against gay marriage argue we are a democracy and the voice of the people shall stand…always!
Frankly, I always have thought that is the biggest problem with people’s definition of that style of governing. It took Loving v. Virginia to allow interracial couples to marry…the majority would have never allowed it.

The majority of Americans read on a 7th grade level and have actually never even picked up a copy of the United States Constitution. If you haven’t read it lately, Google it today when you have time. It is actually good reading, a beautiful document.

The 14th Amendment, Section 1 to the Constitution reads as follows:
All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

Plain English? As a queer girl I get the same rights as a straight girl and equal protection under the law. I cannot be denied any right or privilege heterosexuals have by any state as long as I am a citizen of the United States…it is illegal to do so. Wow, that sounds surprisingly simple!

Notice it doesn’t mention religion, we have that little rule “separation of church and state” in America. My marriage has nothing to do with your religion or any one else’s religion. It is a civil ceremony and a civil right if I am a citizen of these United States.

The Declaration of Independence is also worth a re-read…check out this part of the preamble, in particular:
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men/women are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

I had the officiate of my wedding read that very passage at the beginning of the ceremony. We were pursuing our happiness as every day, good old, law-abiding, American citizens.

Oh, okay…back to my wife. For the purpose of this blog we will call her “Linda.” Well, because her name is Linda. We had been together for nine years when I proposed, having lived through previous relationships that were not the right fit…this was indeed, the right fit.

I met Linda through mutual friends and knew right away that my life would never be the same. She is as good, honest, and caring of a person as you will ever meet. It’s ten years later and I am still trying to figure out what she sees in me. I will go the rest of my life protecting her interests, her happiness is always at the forefront of my mind.

We booked the trip, making reservations at the St. Regis at Monarch Beach. If you are a fan of the Orange County Housewives, they often go to the spa or dinner at this very resort. The crooks from AIG were spending some of the bail-out money there around that time too, but we will talk about that another time.

It is a glorious, 5 star resort…the setting would be a white gazebo, at sunset, overlooking the Pacific. We were surrounded by a great group of family and friends that were witness to our testimony of commitment. Customs and ceremonies do matter…rituals matter….legality matters. It changed our relationship for the better and continues to do so, we are legit.

If you have read my other blogs, you know that I am not the hard-ass that I play on TV. I blubber like a baby all the time….and my wedding was no different. It had not occurred to me when I was a child that I would ever get a day like October 3, 2008. I didn’t have a phrase for it then, like I do now….but I felt I was a second-class citizen.

Wedding showers and walks down the aisle were for all the other girls, not me. Some argue I could have had it all, if only I had married a man.
My pursuit of truth and the drive for my inalienable rights does not include living a lie…that looks like the contradiction it is, even as I type this sentence.

This is a love letter. I am unabashedly in love with Linda, my spouse….who just happens to be a woman….I feel good today and every day because of that love. I want to spend the rest of my life with her…wouldn’t it be nice if we could do that legally in Texas?

I cannot change anything about me or her…the genetic groundwork was done for us long ago. If this was a choice, why would we choose to be part of a minority that is disparaged and rebuked daily? To my detractors, I say, “Why does our love lessen yours?” And I promise not to blog in a couple of years, lobbying for my wiener dog to marry a goat.

I don’t know, maybe I am missing the boat. This all seems unmitigated when you see it in black and white…if only a 7th grader could understand it.

Guest Post Sent in By: Julya Billhymer
Age: 48
Location: Fort Worth, Texas
Blog: Dyke In The Heart of Texas