2004
My First…..what?
1)My first kiss?
2)My first girlfriend?
3)My first time having sex?
4)My first time making out?
5)My first time feeling incredibly alive?
6)My first orgasm?
I can tell you all about one and three. I have yet to feel alive by the hands of another girl, although I did get close once, I’ve never had an orgasm, oh but i’ve been close. and bringing up my first girlfriend would cause way to much memory pain. and I can’t quite recall the first time I made out with my first girlfriend.
So let me tell you the first of two stories that envolve the same time period….
I had been invited to her house for three days, it was all my mother would allow. I was 16, sweet 16 and never been kissed. She didn’t drive yet so her Mom and her picked me up, we drove by a winery and I was dying to hold her hand. Finally she placed her hand over mine. We got food, we went up to her house on Cobb. We spent a lot of time in the basement room. She played music and talked to me. I couldn’t eat. She said, “Would you be my girlfriend?”I waited, my stomach jumped, and I said these two little words that would become my trade mark, “Of course.”
I was dying to kiss her. I didn’t know how. Her mom expected me to sleep in a sleeping bag on top of her bed, instead of under the covers with her. She laughed and said she’d sneak me under the cover so that she could learn what if felt like to sleep with me. I don’t remember a whole lot about the rest of that day, I do remember changing into my pajamas in her pink bathroom.I remember getting into the bed. I remember her touching me.
Touching me
Touching me
Touching me.
I remember scooting to the edge of the bed, scared. She came up behind me, I remember her saying she wanted to kiss me. I said I didn’t know how. She said, “I’ll teach you.”
I remember her lips, even now, her lips were soft, they always were. I remember slipping my tongue into her mouth, she was surprised. She had braces, I remember feeling them on my bottom lip.
I remember our clashing teeth, her laughter, her scent, my laughter, my stomach hurt, her touching my shoulders, then I wrapped my arms around her and we just…kissed. and kissed. and kissed. I think there was a lot of sexuality explored (though no actual sex) that night, but I don’t really remember it as well as I would like to.
She was my first girlfriend, my first love, my closest friend, she was everything.She’s gone now, has been for almost a year. But oh I remember her, and I remember her fondly, though sometimes I can’t help but feel immeasurable pain.
