2004
Can we talk
i don’t recall the very first time. i wish i did. maybe i’d know why i grow attached so easily to so many, why every single person i come across has to matter. wanting, reaching out, being overwhelmed, hearing “you’re scary” (or WORSE) then losing ppl to the world. if never nurtured it doesn’t grow, but does leave an imprint in my mind, and somewhere else i can’t quite describe. being so blunt and honest about what goes on within me makes me feel naked. my quest i guess is for someone to take my pains away, make me laugh at my past, make it seem like a bad joke. the prospect of someday being WHOLE and not dominated by demons in self pity attires is intoxicating, to the point i can almost feel endorphins being released in my body, and a half smile cracking in my lips. OO, there’s Ms. Hope! i manage to indulge myself in these foolish positive thoughts once in a while. reality can be a B****!
