2005
1st Ep
Okay, so, love it or hate it I’m an opinionist and here’s how it is. Debate with me, I don’t mind. In no particular order, but numbered for her pleasure:
L WORD FIRST EP SPOILERS AFTER THE JUMP
01 – Soap Opera.
02 – Jenny is still a twat. TWAT TWAT TWAT. I can’t even look at her.
03 – Haha, nice move Tim. Break her easy. Did I mention I have no sympathy for her? TWAT.
04 – I enjoy Shane’s new hair. I know many of you don’t. It’s okay, she can pull off the fuzzy animal on her head look. Promise.
05 – I enjoy Shane’s gal Carmen. They’re going to be cute together.
06 – Carmen should cut her hair, and stop airbrushing her tattoos.
07 – HELLO SHANE. CURLY HAIRED GIRL OR CARMEN?! Where was your brain?
08 – I want to kill Dana’s fiancee, but I think we’re supposed to hate her.
09 – Alice is adorable, aww, even if she’s a hypocrite (hi, what are you telling Bette to do, as you’re doing it with Dana? RIGHT.).
10 – Aww, Kit is so cool. That was really sweet of her to say that to Bette about Ivan.
11 – Ivan makes a better girl. Whoever does her drag needs some lessons.
12 – Ivan is also a dumbass. You give the girl KEYS and say DROP BY ANYTIME and then you GET PISSED WHEN SHE DOES?! What did you EXPECT? Git.
13 – By the way, I hate the new music.
14 – I won’t miss Marina. I’m not gonna lie.
15 – OH AND TINA, YOU GO! I really can’t believe Bette but whatever.
16 – I can’t decide if I want them back together or not.
17 – I feel like they should be, because you need that stable couple that gives the rest of us hope. But they already fucked that.
18 – In the other vein, Bette did a MAJOR BOO BOO. I kind of wish Tina wouldn’t give in, I think she’s doing an excellent angry-job.
19 – She will give in. Meh.
20 – Did I mention Dana is annoying me less this season, but she’s gotten a bigger ego? Hmm. I don’t think I mind.
21 – Hey let’s play everyone throw themselves at Shane. Sometimes it’s just too easy how she gets grrls onscreen.
22 – Makes me wonder about STIs. Let’s talk realism. SOMEONE GET TESTED. Hahahaha.
23 – LMAO! Carmen used to be a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader. I find that really funny.
24 – On the note of Carmen, how is it even possible to have to choose between Shane and Jenny? I mean, Shane’s not my favourite, but JENNY IS A TWAT. Anyway.
25 – I AM SO EXCITED ABOUT LARA COMING BACK ::SWOON:: Heh. Oh yes.
26 – By the way, are we supposed to find Candace repulsive? I’m thinking so.
27 – Hahaha. Tina. TRENCH COAT. CALIFORNIA. Oh, fiction and suspended belief.
28 – Leisha should do me. Okay, that’s random, but what can I say. The bathroom at the Planet says it all. DANA, DUMP THE GOSSIP BITCH WHO LIKES HER COFFEE FOR THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS.
29 – Hi, Tina, can we say putting your friends in an awkward position when Bette comes in? Yeah thanks. Cos I would want to be there to hear you two go at it. Shit.
30 – Does anyone else realize the fact that Jenny gets so many rejection letters, cos, oh, she’s an emo twat who really can’t write? That isn’t even biased. She just can’t write. I can tell that from first season and this ep is no exception.
31 – Yeah Carmen is hot. I think we established this, but LOOPHOLE:
32 – Her tattoos (which are airbrushed) were because of her medicine man dad who she’d never met because he died in an accident …. but somehow gave her tattoos? later in life? or she gets them for a man she doesn’t know? I’m having trouble with this one, really. Someone want to help me out?
33 – I do enjoy the multiple versions of Marina’s suicide attempt. A nice lesbian gossip touch, I must say.
Yeah, s’all I got. 33 is a good number.
by toni riot
