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The funniest things in my life happened to my finacee and I two weeks ago. First, I must say, we spent four days together, which may sound crazy, but is the longest consecutive time we’ve spent together. I stayed in her dorm Friday, and she came home with me Saturday and went back Monday. We had a great time and that’s the weekend we got engaged. Details to follow:

First Embarrassment: 3-ish Saturday morning, her roommate who KNEW we were there because there was a note “Enter at your own risk.” on the door, walked in on me–naked. My girlfriend was dressed because she was going to get me a glass of water and the ice machine was in the lobby. When she went to open the door, she made the most hilarious sound in the world, giving me just enough time to pull the covers over my head. Then her roommate waltzed in. She had the audacity to speak to me…KNOWING I was naked. “Hi! What are you guys doing?” I said nothing. She got her laptop and left the room…but she left the door open so I had to lay there, still naked. She came back at the same time my girlfriend did. She stayed another 10 minutes. I about died. We got her back around 10 that morning by taking a shower together while she was in the dorm room. We made sure to be extra loud.

Second Embarrassment: Our sex tends to get a little rough, as I have said in previous posts. She bit me, not once, but twice (once on each side of my neck). On the left side, she drew blood and the unsightly hickie was sore to the touch and about the size of a nickel. On the right side, the hickie was perfectly mouth-shaped–not sore, but very very visible. My family Christmas gathering was that weekend. I had to buy $15 worth of concealer and foundation–neither of which I wear–to cover them up. And despite my efforts, they were still highly visible and my mother saw them both. I’m sure my whole family did but were too polite to comment because the issue of my sexuality is a TOUCHY subject.

Third Embarrassment: Sunday night after the family thing and after she proposed we decided to go see a movie. Because I live in Hickville, USA. We drove a half hour away to the theatre and there were no 8:00 movies. So we bought 9:30 tickets for The Holiday and then went to the mall for an hour and a half. We took photobooth pictures and made out in inappropriate places. Anyway, back to the movie…we didn’t watch the movie–duh. The theatre was nearly empty. We sat in the back. Things got hot and heavy…and at one point, because she was wearing a button down shirt…I was paying a lot of attention to The Twins. A girl saw us and told all her friends. They thought I was a boy. The look on their faces when we left the cinema was PRICELESS when they saw that I am a girl. Embarrassing but totally worth it!