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As soon as I read what this month’s topic was I immediately thought of my step-mother JoJo and why I admire her. On February 8, 2007, at age 51, she lost her 6 year battle with breast cancer. To say that event changed so many lives would be an understatement.

When I was 3 years old my parents divorced. They we probably headed for a split from the beginning. They were 17 when they got married and didn’t really know each other the way a couple should when they make that life time commitment. After 10 years of marriage my father had an affair. My mother had him followed by a PI and found out that way.

My Dad stayed with his mistress (JoJo) for the next 25 years. It took me until I became pregnant (at 19) to even allow myself to get close to her. JoJo never treated me any different then her daughter, who at the time she met my Dad was about 7 (and is now one of my best friends). I put my Dad and JoJo through so much. I guess I was just acting out at the time. No matter what I did she was always there for me if I wanted her to be. When I became pregnant I had a very shaky relationship with my mother to say the least (she is an addict). JoJo became the mother I needed.

When I had my daughter she was my support system. She was a second mother to my child. My daughter and JoJo had an undeniable unconditional love for one another. I too grew to love her like I love my own mother. When she was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer in 2001, my family’s whole world shattered. She was the glue that held us all together. She was selfless and kind. My father and JoJo still held hands on the couch after all these years and never fought in front of us. You could just see the mutual love and respect between the two of them. It was an honor to witness such love.

She fought her first battle with cancer for a year and was “cancer free” for about 2 years. Then it struck again in 2004. For the last 3 years she did chemo, experimental drugs, holistic medicine, you name it she tried it. Not once did she complain. It was the hardest thing in the world to watch. The last year of her life was very tough on her emotionally and physically. She took a quick turn for the worse in January 2007. After a month in the hospital and a few surgeries she finally left us and got her wings (2/8/07). She left this earth with my father lovingly by her side.

I am so grateful that I, my wife Lauren (who was 5 months pregnant at the time with our son), my daughter and all of my family were able to say I love you and good-bye. She was an amazing woman. She was kind, loving, giving and most of all she was accepting. When I came out back in 2002 she didn’t bat an eye. She just told me she would love me no mater what. That’s all I needed to hear. On the 8th of this month it was 8 months that we lost her. My family and I will never be the same, but we are better people for knowing and loving her.

We miss and love you JoJo! I hope your soaring high above us with those beautiful butterfly wings.