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It’s an interesting topic, and I’m sure if you ask 100 people what their definition of “sexy” is you’ll get 100 different answers. For me, it’s so much more than looks, and so many times it’s not even about sex. For me, sexy starts in the eyes, but it’s not the color, or the shape, or the decoration around the “windows to the soul” or lack thereof. There’s got to be “the twinkle”. That little spark that tells me there’s a slightly different, possibly “off kilter” consciousness in there, in the mind behind the eyes. It’s the soul peeking out through fluttering lashes that starts me down the path of finding someone sexy.

Because that “twinkle” means intelligence, and a smart woman is THE sexiest of all. I don’t care how physically beautiful, fit, and well-shaped a woman is, if she opens her mouth and reveals ignorance, well, it’s just over for me. She doesn’t have to have a huge, fancy education or a big vocabulary. She doesn’t have to work in a high-powered office. Sexy intelligence has nothing to do with what you do for a living or where you went to college or even IF you went. It’s a presence, a knowing look, a glance and a glimmer, an awareness that radiates from her, her sense of her body in the space that it takes up, an awareness of mine, next to her, across a room, where ever. Once the gazes of 2 intelligent woman have crossed, there is no going back. The gaze of a smart woman changes you, makes you want MORE, more from yourself and more from her.

A sexy woman is self confident, but not arrogant. A sexy woman has been through tough times and come out bearing grace instead of a grudge. A sexy woman does NOT have a chip on her shoulder. As sexy woman understands the power of a simple touch, whether it’s to comfort a friend, or arouse a lover. A sexy woman is capable, and if she doesn’t know how to do something she needs to do, she figures it out and gets it done with little fanfare. A sexy woman is 21 or 81 or anywhere in between. A sexy woman can capture your heart with a meal, a smile, a card, or smudge of paint on her nose. A sexy woman knows exactly who she is and has no reason to apologize for it.

And if you look at her right, every woman is a sexy woman.