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They all look like you. She has your eyes in just the right light. Another has your hair, always in that beautifully sloppy pony tail. There was one that had your cheeks, and yet another your lips, but none of them have your smile. A smile that I have traced over and over in my mind every day since the last time I saw you. A smile that couples with a laugh that makes my heart heave with the happiest butterflies in the world. I see a little bit of you in so many, but not one of them is you.

It may seem like I’ve given up. It may seem like I’ve stopped looking, but I promise you I haven’t. I told you I would love you forever and I’ve refused to make another promise to anyone since then. My heart is with you, as is all my focus on my promise. You are with me when I first wake up, you are there when the sun falls, the only time you are not there is in my dreams. I keep telling myself it means something. It means that I need more than just to dream of you. I need to touch you and hold you and kiss every last inch of you.

I like to think that some times we think of one another at the same time. I like to think that when we do that we are more connected than we ever were. I like to think that you miss me more than you admit. That you are looking for me just as much as I am looking for you. Because I am certain, more now than ever, that we have loved one another for lifetimes before this. I am certain that something like this love is too spectacular to quit. So I bide my time without you. Making myself better for you. Learning how to love me.

So when you close your eyes, and if you read this like I know you will, I need you to remember a few things. I have loved you since the moment we met. I am the one that you need not say a word to, and you are the one that I can tell my everything to. It may feel like we are worlds a part, but I’ve always been right next to you. I’ve always seen your hand in mine, and I have never given up hope in us. So when you find your way back to me it will be like the first time we met, but this time I won’t wait to tell you I love you. This time you’ll never get me to stop saying the words.

I’ll be here when you can’t pretend you don’t miss me anymore.