thelesbianlifestyle.com

I really, really hope this is some kind of joke.

Yet you are still in school and will assume you are a misguided teenager. I’ll assume that because any gay person who can possibly think that gay rights are “squirrely” needs some serious therapy.

I really don’t care who you voted for. It’s not my business or my concern.

But I can tell you that the gays that are severely beaten and even murdered just because of who they love — THEY want hate crime laws.

As their community member. I want hate crime legislation.

Because assault is bad — but EVEN worse if the reason behind it is someone’s sexuality. Just like if the reason behind it was their race.

And by reading your post am I to assume that you would think less of these people you “love” if they weren’t married to each other? Is their marital status really what you respect about them? Or is it their character?

See because those of us who believe in civil rights think we should be judged on our character, not who we sleep with.

I can’t BELIEVE I’m explaining this to one of our own.

The fact that you are more concerned about your precious guns than you are about your fellow LGBT community who was collectively slapped in the face speaks volumes on your priorities.

The right to bear arms is in the FEDERAL Constitution. And at no time did Obama say he was going to ban guns. Rest assured. You can still go shoot Bambi while the rest of us stand up against the intolerance and hatred that is put upon us.

The REST of us are trying to explain to our children why the government is allowing us to be mistreated.

The REST of us are out trying to insure an equality for the LGBT youth that are about to come out and that are not yet born.

The REST of us are trying to fight for our twilight years when we’re in nursing homes and are told our “friend” can’t live in the same room.

The REST of us are trying to fight for our survivorship benefits.

So get back to us when you’re done mounting Thumper over your fireplace and hopefully by then you’ll realize our right to live is far more important than your right to kill.

Tina-cious.com´s last blog post..A Letter to My Mormon Mother

I would just like to point out that Obama does not intend to take away our 2nd Amendment rights. He only wants to “keep AK-47’s out of the hands of criminals.” I don’t own any guns, but members of my family are avid hunters and my grandmother keeps a handgun in her car. People who carry a gun for protection, who obtain them in legal ways, and who have permits for the guns they own, will not be affected in any way. So go on, keep your guns.

I just wish you cared as much about your civil rights as you do your gun rights.

Moe,

Your post really upset me. Not in a way that makes me want to fight with you, but in a way that makes be feel really sorry for you. I’m personally offended.

To think that you are queer and don’t support of marriage equality and hate crimes legislation saddens me.

It tells me that you don’t support yourself. If you don’t support YOURSELF, you must think that there is something wrong with you. No one should have to feel that way. What are you ashamed of? Who in your life of importance has led you to believe that your rights are not worth fighting for? Have you considered a queer support group? Therapy of some sort?

You can’t seriously think that guns and weapons are more important that equality for all Americans!!! Seriously???

You speak on tradition but that you’re occasionally flexible. Why not flex to supporting your lgbt community in their time of need? Why limit what you’re willing to be flexible with to supporting women in the workforce? This isn’t about who you voted for. Vote for the green goblin for all I care. It’s about your priorities.

Gay rights are YOUR rights. I don’t understand how you can be so cruel to the lgbt community let alone how you can be so cruel to yourself.

Jess

Jess´s last blog post..Chat Live About the Election Tonight!

No one’s gonna take your fucking gun.

Oh no! Women in the workplace! That’s totally not traditional! I’m fucking sick of that goddamn assertion. Women have never stopped working as a gender. Only when people started having leisure time, after 1800-ish, were some women able to stop working. I’d say over a thousand years of working women is a fuck of a lot more traditional than century and a half of upper, or upper-middle class women staying home.

I am really curious as to why you feel “squirrley” about gay marriage. I mean, truly curious. Why would that bother you? And how could it POSSIBLY affect any of the other points you spoke about? How are two women or two men somewhere getting married going to affect YOUR life, if you don’t happen to be one of them? I would just like you to explain what you think will happen. I’m not asking this as a “challenge” to you, I am sincerely curious and want to know what you think.

As far as “tradition” goes…we Americans have FAR less “tradition” than just about any other country, because we are younger. Fifty years ago, I can pretty much assure you the “tradition” would be that, as a female (I’m assuming) you would certainly NOT be allowed inside a machinist’s classroom except as maybe a secretary to the teacher or as a girlfriend of one of the male students. Is THAT the “tradition” you want to hold on to so badly?

However, those changes were likely made before you were born, and so do not scare you so much.

You are certainly entitled to your beliefs, and I do not seek to change your mind in any way. I do ask, however, of you and of ALL of us, to examine WHY we believe the things we do–do we “hold them dear” because they are right and we have learned that they work, or because we’ve been TOLD they are right. There’s a big difference.

Maybe you will discover that on your own one day.

I hope you will continue to post here, and continue to read the comments that come your way.

GG

GG´s last blog post..How COOL is This??

You mention three things three different times in your post, that you feel Obama’s presidency threatens for you: gun control, hate crime legislation, and gay marriage rights.

Gun legislation, and specifically, the Brady Bill that you mentioned, is handgun control to keep guns out of the hands of criminals. It will still allow – as the Federal Constitution declares – citizens to own and carry guns.

The other two things you mentioned, hate crime legislation and gay marriage rights, frankly, do not effect you unless you 1) have committed a hate crime or are survivor of a hate crime, or 2) want to marry someone of the same sex.

Given that you’re a writer here at TLL, I assume that you probably identify in some way as lesbian. Perhaps you believe gays shouldn’t get married, perhaps you think that marriage should be hetero-only. Fine. Don’t get gay married, then. Keep your beliefs and hold tight to them. No one is trying to tell you that you can’t believe that, or that you have to get gay married if gay marriages are legal! It’s legal to do a lot of things that I don’t have any intention of ever doing, like killing a deer for sport or swimming across the East River or eating cow tongue.

Hate crimes are serious offenses that are more than random acts of violence, they are specifically designed to keep a marginalized minority down, out, scared, and “in line” – as the oppressed minority. It is not okay to systematically discriminate, and hate crimes are the manifestation of the permission to do so in a culture. That is what hate crime legislation attempts to help – to say that it is serious and unacceptable to take your hate public. No one can change whether you hate other people privately or not (that is an issue only having to do with your karma, the birdhouse in your soul, your inner calm), but government can and should say that you cannot legally harm or kill another person, and can and should protect people who are discriminated against because of the color of our skin, the genetic makeup of our bodies, or the ways that we form and build our families.

Then you wrote, “[c]hange isn’t necessary for the better.”

Sure, sometimes when things change, they get worse. Sometimes they have to get worse before they get better. And change is uncomfortable, period – we get comfortable in what we know, even if it’s bad. You even said this in your post – “better the devil we know than the devil we don’t.” I so disagree. The “devil we don’t” know is Obama, whose ideologies are poised to change this country for the better. To protect more people, to serve more people, to improve all of our ways of life.

I subscribe to the “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” creed on that one – don’t change things when they’re working. But here’s the thing: IT ISN’T WORKING. We are currently fighting two wars. Millions of Americans are without healthcare. We are in the midst of an economic crisis that threatens a major economic depression. What we’re doing now is not working.

If you’re driving head-on into a tree, you turn the wheel, right? Wouldn’t there be consequences if you continued to drive straight at the tree? Why yes – you’d hit the tree, at best, damage your car, and at worst, die.

The majority of Americans made this decision very clearly: we want to turn the wheel.

Maybe it could get worse, but I can see, I can almost taste the ways that I know it is possible for us all – ALL Americans – to have better, more fulfilling, more joyous lives.

“No one has cared for his policy from the git go and god knows the fact that he just appeared out of nowhere bugged us all.”

Sorry but that’s just incorrect, if only because I cared for his policy. And I saw his rise to stardom with his brilliant 2004 DNC speech. No one comes out of nowhere. Just because you may not have seen him doesn’t mean he wasn’t there. He’s newer than some – McCain, obviously, has been around in federal government for much longer – because Obama is young, and he is a leader. He is clearly a good leader, as we are already appointing him to the highest office one can hold. Or, at least, we think he might potentially be a good leader – good enough to let him try.

So who is this “no one” and “us all” that you’re speaking for, on a lesbian community site? Certainly not me. If you’re going to speak for large groups of people, please define for whom you’re speaking.

Nearly at the end, you wrote: “Tradition is what made the people I admire most. … Granted, women in the workforce aren’t all that traditional but I am occasionally flexible.”

I care deeply about tradition too, but my educated guess on this sentence of yours would interpolate that the “tradition” you’re referring to is not the same as mine.

You contradict yourself nearly immediately after with the comment about women in the workforce, which is not “traditional” in the conservative sense – women should be home with the family, that’s the party line. And yet somehow you managed to become “occasionally flexible” with this issue. I won’t speculate as to why your mind has changed – could be your orientation, I’d guess, but could be dozens of other things too.

This is the small glimmer of hope I see in your post: your ability to think for yourself, outside of the traditions that are HARMFUL and detrimental and oppressive, and to draw your own conclusions, and then to re-make your own traditions in new and beautiful ways.

One last quote from your post: “Yeah it may be small minded and yeah it’s the wrong thing to say and think these days but I don’t much care.”

I care.

I care that you are being small-minded, and I care that you are not concerned about your own civil rights.

I care that you are posting this in a space that I thought inherently supported gay rights, gay marriage, and gay activism.

I care that you are voting against my rights AND YOURS.

I care that you probably feel alienated from this queer community (as you infer by mentioning that you expect this post of yours will be unpopular), and I care that liberals & progressives aren’t engaging in a better dialogue with Republican, conservative, and orthodox Christian LGBT folks.

I care about whether or not you read my reaction to your post. I care about whether you respond. I care that I feel like my response – my words and emotions – feels like it’s just going to go out there into the world without landing on anything. I care about engagement.

I care about the health, safety, and happiness of everybody on this planet, including you, and including me.

Can we work together to make it better? I have to believe we can.

sinclair´s last blog post..post-election: on love

Holy crap guys, between the assumption that I’m obviously a misguided teenager to that I may need therapy, I’m a little shocked. It’s my opinion, Christ, and it’s not even one that I thought was all that bad. You guys do know that it’s good to hear from the other side of the arument evry once in a while, right? Even if it’s just to assure yourselves that the other side is nuts. I’m just gonna pull a buncha quotes out of the comments above me and kinda answer them.

“Because assault is bad — but EVEN worse if the reason behind it is someone’s sexuality. Just like if the reason behind it was their race.” No I’m not really buying that argument, any crime is either motivated by hate or stupidity. Just because your gay or black doesn’t mean you get special rights in the courtroom, I don’t understand how that was ever a good idea.

“I just wish you cared as much about your civil rights as you do your gun rights.” I do and I see them as interconnected as well. I just happen to have a different opinion on them. Welcome to free speech.

“It tells me that you don’t support yourself. If you don’t support YOURSELF, you must think that there is something wrong with you. No one should have to feel that way. What are you ashamed of? Who in your life of importance has led you to believe that your rights are not worth fighting for? Have you considered a queer support group? Therapy of some sort?” Ouch. Dang, and I like reading what Jess writes too. I’m happy with myself, I’ve got problems no doubt, but self hatred ain’t one of them. Just not a fan of the whole hate crime thing.

“Oh no! Women in the workplace! That’s totally not traditional! I’m fucking sick of that goddamn assertion.” Ok, I willing to admit my ineptitude on this part. My little rant is a result of what happens when they let the late night librarian (me) have access to computers. Sorry, history completely slipped my mind.

“I am really curious as to why you feel “squirrley” about gay marriage. I mean, truly curious. Why would that bother you? And how could it POSSIBLY affect any of the other points you spoke about? How are two women or two men somewhere getting married going to affect YOUR life, if you don’t happen to be one of them? I would just like you to explain what you think will happen. I’m not asking this as a “challenge” to you, I am sincerely curious and want to know what you think.” Truthfully, gay marriage has no affect on me, as such I wouldn’t have voted either way for it. But I have a low view of any marriage, in my opinion it’s just a piece of paper, nothing more. It’s the same view my parent’s had and it the same view I have. Also I am following my friend Danny’s lead on this one as well. Even if it get’s accepted into law it doesn’t mean anyone besides the courts is going to recognize it. Like I said before, it’s just my opinion. Thanks everyone for speaking up, it’s always fun when people do that on my posts.

@sinclair – Hi there, as far as the whole “No one has cared for his policy from the git go and god knows the fact that he just appeared out of nowhere bugged us all.” I was speaking of my engine performance class. And the whole “I care that you are posting this in a space that I thought inherently supported gay rights, gay marriage, and gay activism.” Sorry, I thought it was just a place to share our stories about life. And yes, I am a lesbian, have been for the last 12 years. I just have different opinions, it’s not a crime the last time I looked. Sorry, I sound like a total asshole, it’s just I was just writing my opinion on things and relating what went on in class yesterday morning.

I don’t have a problem with anything you believe… I don’t have to date you.

But when you downplay something as important as equal rights and protections in your own community that you’ve been in but apparently have not bonded with for 12 years…

…a community of which I am part — and you come here and tell us if it were up to you we’d have no gay rights — don’t blame us for getting pissed off about it.

On top of telling us that either you don’t support gay rights/protection or at the very least are indifferent to it (which is just BEYOND my comprehension) you THEN go on to say that you’re pissed about the possibility that you’ll lose GUN rights (which you’re not)… well, you may as well have grabbed a pile of shit and smeared it in our faces.

I don’t see the difference.

And I certainly don’t apologize.

Tina-cious.com´s last blog post..A Letter to My Mormon Mother

I am also of the mind that any crime against a person is fueled by hate. However, when that crime is killing/raping/brutally beating a black/white/latino/gay/etc person BECAUSE he/she is black/white/etc it is a different ballgame altogether. Are you telling me that the boys who beat Matthew Shepherd nearly to death and tied him to a fence post to die, JUST BECAUSE HE WAS GAY, shouldn’t be punished more severely than someone who shot a bank teller during a bank robbery, or accidentally shoots his buddy and kills him while hunting, etc? Do you see the difference? We need stricter hate crimes legislation.

Loverbunny´s last blog post..I want to fuck you like an animal…

@Loverbunny – No offense, but the crimes that you’re comparing aren’t the same. If we were comparing Matthew Shepard and another person who had the same thing done to them but wasn’t gay, then I say the crimes are the same and the punishments should be the same. I don’t care what someone was thinking during a crime or saying during a crime, it’s what’s done that’s important.
Also, sorry Tina-cious I didn’t mean to tick you off quite so much. I don’t care about gay rights, never have. I have my reasons just as I’m sure you’ve got yours for supporting them. Can’t we just agree to disagree?

Different views and the right to share them are what makes this country beautiful. Moe, I may not understand where you’re coming from, but I do respect your right to share your views. I think there are some political views that I may never understand because I have only walked in my shoes.

I don’t care to ever own a gun, but if you want one it’s your right. I may never get married, but if I want to I think it should be my right. I suppose all that I can hope for is that someday we will all find middle ground.