thelesbianlifestyle.com

Setting: Interior, bedroom, morning
Characters: Erica Hahn, Callie Torres

Erica Hahn: I mean, that was amazing. My whole life. My whole adult life, I have been with men. and it always felt, you know, fine, good. But, I never… I mean, I did, but not… not like this. This is like, needing glasses.

Callie Torres: I blinded you?

Erica Hahn: When I was a kid, I would get these headaches, and I went to the doctor and they said that I needed glasses. I didn’t understand that, it didn’t make sense to me because I could see fine, and then I get the glasses and I put them on and I’m in the car on the way home and suddenly I yell. Because the big green blobs that I’ve been staring at my whole life, they weren’t big green blobs. They were leaves. On trees. I could see the leaves. And I didn’t even know I was missing leaves, I didn’t know leaves existed, and then leaves. You are glasses. I am so gay. I am so so so gay! I am extremely gay.

Grey’s Anatomy fucked it up again. It may not seem important in the wake of the election or the recent clusterfuck of Proposition 8, but it’s appalling nonetheless. What am I talking about? This. Erica Hahn, the beautiful blonde doctor who seems to be the only real person on Grey’s Anatomy has been forcibly removed from the show. This week’s episode, two episodes following the episode where Hahn realizes that she’s gay (see above), they gave her character the axe. I don’t know who gave the order, but rumor is that it came down from the network. Way to go, ABC.

WHAT!? This relationship has been the only thing retaining my interest this season. I for one am pretty fond of all the queer women on otherwise “mainstream” tv lately (see also Olivia Wilde who plays Thirteen on House, and Michaela Conlin who plays Angela on Bones). I know that media exposure does not in any way, shape or form equal civil rights. It is what it is; media exposure. This can be good, it can be bad, but it was just nice to see two women enter a relationship in the middle of a predominantly heterosexual on-screen environment.

If you remember, Isaiah Washington (Dr. Preston Burke) was fired for harassing T.R. Knight (George) about being gay, and so Burke was written out of the show. Brooke Smith’s character, Erica Hahn, was brought in as a replacement heart(?) doctor. Through the course of some episodes, it became apparent that Hahn and Callie, played by the very sexy Sara Ramirez, had some unresolved sexual tension going on.

Now, I can’t say I was happy with the way they handled the beginning of their relationship. Towards the end of last season, Callie and Hahn put on a show for the handsome and arrogant Dr. Mark Sloane in the elevator; the ladies had been teasing Sloane, saying he couldn’t handle them in a threesome. Sloane disagreed, but said he wasn’t going to try it. At this point, Hahn leans in and kisses Callie… it’s very nice, but then she pulls away and looks at Sloane, stating, “See? Too much for you.” And right there, Grey’s gives us the usual lesbianism-for-tv bullshit; girls together for the benefit of men. I was happy to see a little action, but overall saddened to see it cheapened.

Then in the next episode, or the one after that, I can’t remember, Sloane pushes Callie away from a potential night of meaningless sex and tells her to go talk to Hahn, and face her feelings. Callie stumbles around telling Hahn how she feels, and this time she initiates the kiss. And. Um. It’s fantastic. But again, Sloane lurks in the background watching… so the ladies are still putting on a show to satisfy a man’s desires.

THIS SCENE. This scene in season five, where Hahn tells Callie that she ‘is glasses’… this is the only thing we see that isn’t for the benefit of anyone else. They’re alone together. It’s an intimate moment between them in the morning after an apparently very good romp in the hay, and Hahn is telling Callie something huge. It’s a perfect moment, utterly beautiful and completely heart-breaking as we see Callie freak out about Hahn’s revelation and leave in a rush. I’m sure many of us have been on one side or the other of a similar situation before.

My problem is not with the show or the awkward handling of Callie’s freakout, even though this freakout entailed multiple shag sessions with her and Sloane so he could first “teach” her how to go down on a woman so Callie could get Hahn off, and then later to reinforce with her what sex with men was like so she could compare it to sex with women. (Although, come on! This was just an excuse to get Callie back in bed with Sloane to keep the straight folk interested. I think most women who have had someone go down on them would know what they had enjoyed and could probably use that as a place to start… it’s not rocket science.) My problem is that after this episode, they decided to cut Hahn out of the show.

They claimed Hahn didn’t have the same kind of ‘magic’ as the other characters. No, she didn’t! She was real. She wasn’t like the other Grey’s characters who ramble on with the same stupid drivel that the writers obviously think is poignant – anyone who watches knows what I mean. That overly dramatic, emo-emphasized monologue crap. She didn’t sleep around. She didn’t hang all over men, or drool after them. She didn’t tell her secrets to everyone and then act shocked when they got out. She was private, and dignified, and kept her distance. And they’re getting rid of her because she doesn’t have the ‘magic.’

They’ve said they aren’t doing this because Hahn is gay, and point out there is still a lesbian character on the show – Callie. Ha! Right. She’s bi, and arguably doesn’t seem all that inclined towards women after all. And if you read the article, you’ll see that soonish they’ll be getting a new character, Sadie, who’s bisexual and, it seems, a bit of a whore. I don’t think I’m alone in asking, what the fuck?

But I think I know the real reason Hahn was canned. Sure, she looks reasonably feminine… you know, long curly hair. Boobs. But she isn’t typically feminine in the way this show portrays typical femininity. She actually comes off – to me, anyways – a tad masculine, or as masculine as ABC could ever allow a woman to be. She doesn’t wear makeup and has rather harsh facial features, as compared to the other women on the show. She’s no nonsense and even pretty cruel to her fellows. She’s got power. She’s in control. It’s sexy.

And because of her atypical femininity (or, her masculine traits) she’s gotta go. Most of the other heads of departments are men; Derek is brains, Sloane is plastics, Burke used to be hearts until Hahn came (and went), the Chief is a man. Hahn’s masculinity is a threat to the men on the show. The writers cannot even let Callie get remotely close to a place where she might realize that Hahn could be enough to completely satisfy her sexually. At the end of the episode, after sleeping with Sloane and cheating on Hahn twice in one day, Callie announces that she doesn’t prefer women over men, in fact, both are equally good. Callie is simply choosing to be with Hahn. Hahn is no better for Callie than men, and she may go back to men at any time, which she’s already done today, twice, so that the men in the audience don’t have to abandon Callie as a sex symbol.

Hahn’s realization, on the other hand, is not comforting or sexy to the male viewer. Hahn realizes that men are inadequate for her and have been so all along without her knowledge; she realizes that she is a lesbian. This realization shuts out the male audience. Men in the audience are no longer watching Hahn and Callie kiss, thinking about having a threesome. Now it’s a lesbian and an bi girl, and guys don’t have a chance with the lesbian, so she’s gotta go. She’s not fun anymore. She’s not spank bank material, and so she’s simply unable to stay because she’s a threat to men, because she could satisfy a woman and be satisfied only by women.

And what was Hahn’s last scene in the show? Getting into her car. They didn’t write her out, she just gets into her car at the end of the day. It ends abruptly, unplanned. The next episode has the other characters pathetically grappling with questions of “wtf? Hahn’s gone?” just like we are. Someone high up decided that Hahn being a lesbian bothered them and didn’t bother transitioning her out, however when an actual human being working on the show harasses a fellow cast member, they write him out and allow him to film the episodes that would allow for a believable on-show exit. WHAT THE FUCK. Why do we let a homophobic, hateful person stick around and finish up, but awkwardly and abruptly fire an actress who portrays (very well, I may add) a gay character and did nothing wrong?

Bad form, ABC. And shame on you, Gray’s Anatomy big wigs. I’m not happy. And I’m not the only one.