Comments on: The lesbian friendship-Fact or fiction? http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/2009/03/01/the-lesbian-friendship-fact-or-fiction/ Mon, 21 May 2012 19:48:39 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: AuriesLover_KittKatt23 http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/2009/03/01/the-lesbian-friendship-fact-or-fiction/comment-page-1/#comment-5240 AuriesLover_KittKatt23 Tue, 07 Jul 2009 16:17:39 +0000 http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/?p=3055#comment-5240 Well in this day and age you're up against anyone and anything but that doesn't mean all lesbian friendships end up being relation ships.... I agree with Jill that there are ways to just be friends with a lesbian...you just have to know the right things to do or say in the situation at hand. Case in point, if you know you only wanna be friends try making that clear without sounding rudee or anything like that...it worked for me up until I became one then I made it clear when I didn't want to be with people in that way. All in all it seems to always manage itelf...if you have anymore questions I'm free to answer them..... Keep your head up Phoneix....you seem cool.. <3 Katt!<div class="comment-remix-meta"><a href="#" class="replyto" onclick="replyto('5240','AuriesLover_KittKatt23'); return false;">Reply</a> - <a href="#" class="quote" onclick="quote('5240','AuriesLover_KittKatt23','Well in this day and age you\'re up against anyone and anything but that doesn\'t mean all lesbian friendships end up being relation ships.... I agree with Jill that there are ways to just be friends with a lesbian...you just have to know the right things to do or say in the situation at hand. Case in point, if you know you only wanna be friends try making that clear without sounding rudee or anything like that...it worked for me up until I became one then I made it clear when I didn\'t want to be with people in that way. All in all it seems to always manage itelf...if you have anymore questions I\'m free to answer them.....\r\n\r\nKeep your head up Phoneix....you seem cool..\r\n\r\n<3 Katt!'); return false;">Quote</a></div> Well in this day and age you’re up against anyone and anything but that doesn’t mean all lesbian friendships end up being relation ships…. I agree with Jill that there are ways to just be friends with a lesbian…you just have to know the right things to do or say in the situation at hand. Case in point, if you know you only wanna be friends try making that clear without sounding rudee or anything like that…it worked for me up until I became one then I made it clear when I didn’t want to be with people in that way. All in all it seems to always manage itelf…if you have anymore questions I’m free to answer them…..

Keep your head up Phoneix….you seem cool..

<3 Katt!

Reply – Quote
]]> By: Diane http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/2009/03/01/the-lesbian-friendship-fact-or-fiction/comment-page-1/#comment-4593 Diane Tue, 03 Mar 2009 14:44:32 +0000 http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/?p=3055#comment-4593 Phoenix, things generally tend to get easier with experience. I'm just starting out and am fairly clueless as to how to negotiate this whole love/friendship thing. Your question and thoughts made me think about what I want, too--so thanks for your help and best of luck in your search for both friendship and love...<div class="comment-remix-meta"><a href="#" class="replyto" onclick="replyto('4593','Diane'); return false;">Reply</a> - <a href="#" class="quote" onclick="quote('4593','Diane','Phoenix, things generally tend to get easier with experience. I\'m just starting out and am fairly clueless as to how to negotiate this whole love\/friendship thing. Your question and thoughts made me think about what I want, too--so thanks for your help and best of luck in your search for both friendship and love...'); return false;">Quote</a></div> Phoenix, things generally tend to get easier with experience. I’m just starting out and am fairly clueless as to how to negotiate this whole love/friendship thing. Your question and thoughts made me think about what I want, too–so thanks for your help and best of luck in your search for both friendship and love…
Reply – Quote
]]> By: Phoenix http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/2009/03/01/the-lesbian-friendship-fact-or-fiction/comment-page-1/#comment-4590 Phoenix Tue, 03 Mar 2009 08:37:50 +0000 http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/?p=3055#comment-4590 <a href='#comment-4589' rel="nofollow">@Diane</a> - What do I think? Hmmmm....first thought-touche my friend. Touche. Fair point. Second thought-I need to think more carefully about what I really mean before I type things. Final thought-I have no clue what I'm doing and you have now brought that to my attention. Hard truth. And yes, when I meet these people I look at them at potential relationships. However, as soon as one of us says "Let's just be friends" I take that as the final word. I guess I don't define boundaries sufficiently. Hmmmm....well, that's food for thought from all of you. My thanks.<div class="comment-remix-meta"><a href="#" class="replyto" onclick="replyto('4590','Phoenix'); return false;">Reply</a> - <a href="#" class="quote" onclick="quote('4590','Phoenix','<a href=\'#comment-4589\' rel=\"nofollow\">@Diane<\/a> - What do I think? Hmmmm....first thought-touche my friend. Touche. Fair point.\r\n\r\nSecond thought-I need to think more carefully about what I really mean before I type things.\r\n\r\nFinal thought-I have no clue what I\'m doing and you have now brought that to my attention. Hard truth. And yes, when I meet these people I look at them at potential relationships. However, as soon as one of us says \"Let\'s just be friends\" I take that as the final word. I guess I don\'t define boundaries sufficiently. Hmmmm....well, that\'s food for thought from all of you. My thanks.'); return false;">Quote</a></div> @Diane – What do I think? Hmmmm….first thought-touche my friend. Touche. Fair point.

Second thought-I need to think more carefully about what I really mean before I type things.

Final thought-I have no clue what I’m doing and you have now brought that to my attention. Hard truth. And yes, when I meet these people I look at them at potential relationships. However, as soon as one of us says “Let’s just be friends” I take that as the final word. I guess I don’t define boundaries sufficiently. Hmmmm….well, that’s food for thought from all of you. My thanks.

Reply – Quote
]]> By: Diane http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/2009/03/01/the-lesbian-friendship-fact-or-fiction/comment-page-1/#comment-4589 Diane Tue, 03 Mar 2009 08:10:57 +0000 http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/?p=3055#comment-4589 Ok. Phoenix, I agree w/ G, Sasha and Jill about communication: even tho it could be a little awkward, expectations should be made clear at the start. But, expectations can and do change. Also, I noticed in your reply (2/2, 9:06pm) that you talked about finding your soulmate in a group of 7? I thought we were talking about friendship? I'm wondering whether you, too, may be a little confused as to what it is you want from meeting women? Although I agree w/ alot of what Audpicc said, but I think that women who meet online don't want only sex--like you, some women's choices of venue are limited. Seems to me that women who join clubs, have hobbies, or take classes are looking for friendship and for love--not necessarily both--although some want to build a relationship on the secure foundation of friendship. What do you think?<div class="comment-remix-meta"><a href="#" class="replyto" onclick="replyto('4589','Diane'); return false;">Reply</a> - <a href="#" class="quote" onclick="quote('4589','Diane','Ok. Phoenix, I agree w\/ G, Sasha and Jill about communication: even tho it could be a little awkward, expectations should be made clear at the start. But, expectations can and do change. \r\n\r\nAlso, I noticed in your reply (2\/2, 9:06pm) that you talked about finding your soulmate in a group of 7? I thought we were talking about friendship? I\'m wondering whether you, too, may be a little confused as to what it is you want from meeting women? \r\n\r\nAlthough I agree w\/ alot of what Audpicc said, but I think that women who meet online don\'t want only sex--like you, some women\'s choices of venue are limited. Seems to me that women who join clubs, have hobbies, or take classes are looking for friendship and for love--not necessarily both--although some want to build a relationship on the secure foundation of friendship. What do you think?'); return false;">Quote</a></div> Ok. Phoenix, I agree w/ G, Sasha and Jill about communication: even tho it could be a little awkward, expectations should be made clear at the start. But, expectations can and do change.

Also, I noticed in your reply (2/2, 9:06pm) that you talked about finding your soulmate in a group of 7? I thought we were talking about friendship? I’m wondering whether you, too, may be a little confused as to what it is you want from meeting women?

Although I agree w/ alot of what Audpicc said, but I think that women who meet online don’t want only sex–like you, some women’s choices of venue are limited. Seems to me that women who join clubs, have hobbies, or take classes are looking for friendship and for love–not necessarily both–although some want to build a relationship on the secure foundation of friendship. What do you think?

Reply – Quote
]]> By: G http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/2009/03/01/the-lesbian-friendship-fact-or-fiction/comment-page-1/#comment-4587 G Tue, 03 Mar 2009 04:20:50 +0000 http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/?p=3055#comment-4587 There are a few things that have been consistent in my life experience: - The lesbians I end up actually having friendships with are lesbians I Wouldn't ever be attracted to otherwise. I identify as butch, and I'm attracted to femme women. I don't have a lot of femme friends because I've had the same experience - wires get crossed, signals get mixed, and the friendship suffers because of it. - (Generalization alert) People like attention. Sometimes positive attention can be misconstrued for attraction. I agree with Sasha and Jill: communication is paramount in order to make sure everyone is on the same page.<div class="comment-remix-meta"><a href="#" class="replyto" onclick="replyto('4587','G'); return false;">Reply</a> - <a href="#" class="quote" onclick="quote('4587','G','There are a few things that have been consistent in my life experience: \r\n \r\n- The lesbians I end up actually having friendships with are lesbians I Wouldn\'t ever be attracted to otherwise. I identify as butch, and I\'m attracted to femme women. I don\'t have a lot of femme friends because I\'ve had the same experience - wires get crossed, signals get mixed, and the friendship suffers because of it.\r\n\r\n- (Generalization alert) People like attention. Sometimes positive attention can be misconstrued for attraction. I agree with Sasha and Jill: communication is paramount in order to make sure everyone is on the same page.'); return false;">Quote</a></div> There are a few things that have been consistent in my life experience:

- The lesbians I end up actually having friendships with are lesbians I Wouldn’t ever be attracted to otherwise. I identify as butch, and I’m attracted to femme women. I don’t have a lot of femme friends because I’ve had the same experience – wires get crossed, signals get mixed, and the friendship suffers because of it.

- (Generalization alert) People like attention. Sometimes positive attention can be misconstrued for attraction. I agree with Sasha and Jill: communication is paramount in order to make sure everyone is on the same page.

Reply – Quote
]]>