2009
TLL Adult Review: Boss Lady
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When I got this, I initially wasn’t sure whether this was the Boss vibrator from Fun Factory, as Babeland shows a different looking vibrator on their site, with a less matte finish and different controls on the bottom. The vibrator I received is a soft, sort of squishy, matte silicone dildo with a “turbo” button on the base. I found out later from Babeland that the Boss was being discontinued and the vibrator I got is the Boss Lady, which has a newly designed control and the turbo feature. Myself and a friend both recieved the same toy and spent some time talking this evening about some technical difficulties we both had experienced to varying degrees. Sad to say, she hasn’t managed to get them worked out, and to be honest, she shouldn’t have to. A vibrator should just work. Batteries in, compartment closed, switch it on, and wank off. End of story.
Myself, I had it working in the car but had trouble getting it going at home. Not that I was wanking in the car, but I opened it at home and had to go with my partner to pick up dinner so brought it along and picked up batteries at the drug store… long story. Anyway, so I fiddled with the battery compartment in the car on the way home, and it worked. Then I got into bed, got the thing all lubed up, and… nothing. So I wiped it off and went to figure it out. I had to kind of grab the battery compartment and the shaft and squeeze them together, like, making it shorten itself. And then it miraculously worked again. It took like five or ten minutes to fix, while I was naked and wet. Not really cool. So, let it be known that this vibrator is kind of finicky. Mine works okay now, but other people’s don’t seem to work okay at all. My friend’s problem is that it turns on (in pulse mode setting) right as soon as the cap is screwed on, and none of my tips I learned from my minor Laya Spot problems helped her at all. (These tips include holding the + button while screwing the cap, then pressing and holding for 5 seconds to reset.) Also, the Turbo Button? Is obnoxious. You have to press and HOLD it to keep it on turbo, and I only noticed it kick in in the middle of the pulse settings, which I rarely use to begin with.
So why do I want this?
I just wanted to put that out there before I said this; the toy that I hold in my hands right now is absolute magic. I feel a bit as though I’m having a love affair with a fatally ill magician, though, because while it’s incredibly wonderful I’m seeing these other people struggle with theirs and wondering if mine will get weird again and potentially die. I will be miserable if this happens! This toy caused me to squirt! What I mean by this, is that I experienced female ejaculation for the first time ever. It’s got that right combo of vibration, girth and angle that really worked for me. A large part of the squirting was the way the toy was used, and each person needs different stimulation to have a g-spot orgasm or to squirt. Some need fast thrusts right against the g-spot, others need a constant pressure, and others need a light tapping against it. And because the g-spot reacts to pressure, rather than vibration so much, I also attribute the squirting to the size and angle of the toy, more than the vibration of the vibe.
The Verdict?
I’ve got to approve this one. It’s quiet and has strong vibrations, it has a large, girthy size (8-3/4” long x 1-3/5” diameter), so if you’re a size queen you’ll like this. The matte 100% silicone means you need (waterbased) lube or some extraordinary wetness, or else there’ll be some excess friction. What I mean is that some silicone is smoother and shinier than this silicone, which is matte texture and velvety feeling almost, meaning it’s less slippy.
Would I buy this again?
Knowing what I know now, good and bad? Knowing that it’s divinely large, that it makes me squirt, and that it’s nice, strong, and soft silicone which means it’s got some give when inserted? Also knowing that some of them are wonky? Hell yes. If I had gotten a malfunctioning one that I couldn’t make work, I might be more upset about the wonkiness, but if items arrive defective they can be returned for the same item again. And I have a few other Fun Factory brand vibrators, and the big thing is making sure it works out of box and isn’t a dud. After that, they are reasonably hardy. This one, being as soft as it is, may turn out to be less hardy, but I would still buy it. If you’re a size queen, looking for an upgrade on the basic “vibrating dildo” vibe, check this out.
Expert Tip:
Use it with a clit vibe at your own risk. I almost freaking launched into orbit, man. Seriously, it was a way intense orgasm. There aren’t words. (You should try it though. Or have someone try it for you so you can’t wimp out when it gets OMFGINTENSE. That’s half the battle.)
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Although The Boss didn’t quite do it for my g-spot, I loved the size and texture and flexibility. I don’t know why it seems to have some many problems. That’s horrible because this toy is just.. awesome and some people won’t be able to experience it.
The pictures on Babeland are VERY shiny but I think that’s the photos and not because the toy is as shiny. Maybe.
Adriana´s last blog post..Take me to Babeland