Comments on: My first… http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/2009/08/18/my-first-4/ Sun, 06 Nov 2011 06:14:01 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Sandra http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/2009/08/18/my-first-4/comment-page-1/#comment-5408 Sandra Wed, 19 Aug 2009 14:48:03 +0000 http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/?p=4484#comment-5408 When I read this last night, it so touched something inside me that I dreamt about it and had to come back and post. Self-Medicating doesn't ever solve things - it can in fact make things worse - but I am sure that as a psych major you know it already. But sometimes when we are in the middle of our implosions, it is difficult to see a way out. Substance abuse, may give you a temporary "out" but it will have effects in the long run, to your body, your brain, your life, your marriage and possibly your job. It sounds like you have worked very hard to attain the things that you have, yet you seem to be as diligent in ruining it. I agree with the previous poster - delegate, see if there are community resources that can help your Mom, possibly her church, her circle of friends can pitch in and help her out with errands or making meals for her. Get back to that space where you were able to work out (if not 4x per week, then once in the least), spend time reconnecting with your Wife - I am sure she is suffering in this as well. If you need to take this coming semester off, so that you can finish up with those incompletes - do it. You might not want to but you may just need that extra time to regroup. Stop pushing yourself so hard - you are going to break and that, won't be pretty at all. And talk with a professional - that is one of the best things you can do. The substance abuse should not be a substitute. Hope you get well. -S<div class="comment-remix-meta"><a href="#" class="replyto" onclick="replyto('5408','Sandra'); return false;">Reply</a> - <a href="#" class="quote" onclick="quote('5408','Sandra','When I read this last night, it so touched something inside me that I dreamt about it and had to come back and post.\r\n\r\nSelf-Medicating doesn\'t ever solve things - it can in fact make things worse - but I am sure that as a psych major you know it already. But sometimes when we are in the middle of our implosions, it is difficult to see a way out. Substance abuse, may give you a temporary \"out\" but it will have effects in the long run, to your body, your brain, your life, your marriage and possibly your job. \r\n\r\nIt sounds like you have worked very hard to attain the things that you have, yet you seem to be as diligent in ruining it. I agree with the previous poster - delegate, see if there are community resources that can help your Mom, possibly her church, her circle of friends can pitch in and help her out with errands or making meals for her.\r\n\r\nGet back to that space where you were able to work out (if not 4x per week, then once in the least), spend time reconnecting with your Wife - I am sure she is suffering in this as well. If you need to take this coming semester off, so that you can finish up with those incompletes - do it. You might not want to but you may just need that extra time to regroup. \r\n\r\nStop pushing yourself so hard - you are going to break and that, won\'t be pretty at all.\r\n\r\nAnd talk with a professional - that is one of the best things you can do. The substance abuse should not be a substitute.\r\n\r\nHope you get well.\r\n\r\n-S'); return false;">Quote</a></div> When I read this last night, it so touched something inside me that I dreamt about it and had to come back and post.

Self-Medicating doesn’t ever solve things – it can in fact make things worse – but I am sure that as a psych major you know it already. But sometimes when we are in the middle of our implosions, it is difficult to see a way out. Substance abuse, may give you a temporary “out” but it will have effects in the long run, to your body, your brain, your life, your marriage and possibly your job.

It sounds like you have worked very hard to attain the things that you have, yet you seem to be as diligent in ruining it. I agree with the previous poster – delegate, see if there are community resources that can help your Mom, possibly her church, her circle of friends can pitch in and help her out with errands or making meals for her.

Get back to that space where you were able to work out (if not 4x per week, then once in the least), spend time reconnecting with your Wife – I am sure she is suffering in this as well. If you need to take this coming semester off, so that you can finish up with those incompletes – do it. You might not want to but you may just need that extra time to regroup.

Stop pushing yourself so hard – you are going to break and that, won’t be pretty at all.

And talk with a professional – that is one of the best things you can do. The substance abuse should not be a substitute.

Hope you get well.

-S

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]]> By: greg (green-eyed girl) http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/2009/08/18/my-first-4/comment-page-1/#comment-5401 greg (green-eyed girl) Tue, 18 Aug 2009 14:28:21 +0000 http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/?p=4484#comment-5401 You need to pull it together now. No excuses. Just stop it and be the mature person that you seem like you were before life threw you a curve ball. There will always be curve balls but the true measure of a "man" is how well you deal with them. Life isn't supposed to be fair, remember that. Pick it up or it take your life apart piece by piece in ways you can't begin to imagine were possible. You've been lucky so far but luck has a way of running out at the worst times. Be well.<div class="comment-remix-meta"><a href="#" class="replyto" onclick="replyto('5401','greg (green-eyed girl)'); return false;">Reply</a> - <a href="#" class="quote" onclick="quote('5401','greg (green-eyed girl)','You need to pull it together now. No excuses. Just stop it and be the mature person that you seem like you were before life threw you a curve ball. There will always be curve balls but the true measure of a \"man\" is how well you deal with them. Life isn\'t supposed to be fair, remember that. Pick it up or it take your life apart piece by piece in ways you can\'t begin to imagine were possible. You\'ve been lucky so far but luck has a way of running out at the worst times. Be well.'); return false;">Quote</a></div> You need to pull it together now. No excuses. Just stop it and be the mature person that you seem like you were before life threw you a curve ball. There will always be curve balls but the true measure of a “man” is how well you deal with them. Life isn’t supposed to be fair, remember that. Pick it up or it take your life apart piece by piece in ways you can’t begin to imagine were possible. You’ve been lucky so far but luck has a way of running out at the worst times. Be well.
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]]> By: Tina-cious.com http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/2009/08/18/my-first-4/comment-page-1/#comment-5399 Tina-cious.com Tue, 18 Aug 2009 14:01:42 +0000 http://thelesbianlifestyle.com/?p=4484#comment-5399 I'd say step one is to not self-medicate. Ask others for help to balance things out. Do you have siblings? Relatives? Anyone that can help w/ mom? If not, friends to help with your chores, errands? Is your partner stepping up? I'm sorry to hear that life feels like it's falling apart, but no good can come from adding substance abuse to the mix. I hope everything works out soon!<div class="comment-remix-meta"><a href="#" class="replyto" onclick="replyto('5399','Tina-cious.com'); return false;">Reply</a> - <a href="#" class="quote" onclick="quote('5399','Tina-cious.com','I\'d say step one is to not self-medicate. Ask others for help to balance things out.\r\n\r\nDo you have siblings? Relatives? Anyone that can help w\/ mom? If not, friends to help with your chores, errands? Is your partner stepping up?\r\n\r\nI\'m sorry to hear that life feels like it\'s falling apart, but no good can come from adding substance abuse to the mix.\r\n\r\nI hope everything works out soon!'); return false;">Quote</a></div> I’d say step one is to not self-medicate. Ask others for help to balance things out.

Do you have siblings? Relatives? Anyone that can help w/ mom? If not, friends to help with your chores, errands? Is your partner stepping up?

I’m sorry to hear that life feels like it’s falling apart, but no good can come from adding substance abuse to the mix.

I hope everything works out soon!

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