2009
TLL Adult Review: Penetrating Mini Clit Pump
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A big thank you to SexToys for letting me try a clit pump! I’ve never tried a pump of any kind before, so the idea of trying the Penetrating Mini Clit Pump was kind of exciting. My boss had told me she had a partner who could achieve a similar result with their mouth and that it was awesome, and she said I would probably like it. I trust my boss somewhat and figured there had to be something to it, and so decided I’d give it the old college try. My feelings on this toy are mixed. Very mixed. And more than a little confused. I’m going to reject it, but please read on if you need a laugh.
Pump Use
The pump part works well. It form a nice, tight seal and squeezing the bulb creates suction. However, one squeeze creates the same suction as five squeezes, so once it’s there it’s there and that’s the best it does. This is probably not the worst thing in the world – you don’t want to hurt yourself, and it does cause the clit to enlarge somewhat. Contrary to what I’ve heard about penis pumps causing the penis to be less sensitive, I found my clit way more sensitive. Please note that it is inclined to make embarrassing noises if you don’t make sure the seal is good.
Pump Materials
There is a sleeve that helps make the seal that is pressed against your body, around your clit, and the website claims this is silicone but the box says “hygienically superior material.” This leads me to think this is not silicone, but some sort of jelly or elastomer. This means you cannot sterilize this toy, and since it can’t be used with a condom, you should not share it. It also means you can likely use silicone or water-based lube, but dubious materials means that I stick to water-based lube, and for this, I used Pink Water lube.
Clit Penetrator Impossibilities (the mind boggles)
Um, ow? Come again?
I didn’t understand when I requested this how a clit gets penetrated, but look at the description: “Personalize your pump with a slide control that adjusts the depth of clitoral penetration!” They’re really excited about this… but even after using it, I am still at a complete loss.
A clitoris does not have a hole to penetrate.
That’s the bottom line. No hole, no penetration. What it DOES do is stimulate the clit (and poorly, at that), so they should call it “Stimulating Mini Clitoral Pump” instead. Even with the name change, it still would boggle because the vibrations are very poor. Additionally, the slider that extends the “penetrator” is jerky at best and when you get it to move at all, it goes all the way, and destroys the pump’s seal. And it hurts. Because it’s trying to “penetrate” your clit.
Final Verdict
I like the idea of a clit pump. This is decent, but I would suggest you buy something else, anything else, something that isn’t trying to impossibly penetrate your clitoris. The suction is okay, but it’s just okay. The vibration is sad, considering. I got a taste of what the toy does and using this toy left me wanting something better. I can’t say just what makes a good clit pump, but I endeavor to discover this in the future. I’d suggest either of these designs, as they feature a tube that extends from the cup part to the pumping mechanism, which makes more sense.



















