I Want Some Stories

Nov
2009

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I’m still in the closet. Well. Kinda. I’m out to some people. The ones who are closest to me. Three straight friends and one uber gay best friend boy know. But it’s not enough for me. I want/need more. I’d love to ease my way into the GLBT community but there isn’t one where I live. There’s one gay bar and even if I wanted to I couldn’t go. My parents are strict with what I do and where I go. Because of this I don’t really trust my parents. I know the love me and all that jazz but, we’re religious. Not in the “God hates fags” way, but for crying out loud there are three pastors in my family. I myself am spiritual. I’m also black btw. Which adds on another factor. The extended part of my family is who I’m nervous about. I just want to know if there are other people out there in this kind of situation.

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2 Responses to I Want Some Stories

Of course there are gay people out there that are in the same situation like you are. Just be yourself and listen to your heart, it will tell you what to do and when. You will come out when you are ready…You will meet friends and feel more comfortable with who you are. Just hang in there and trust yourself

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by Dace on November 21st, 2009 at 11:11 PM

hello!just wanna say that your message moved me because i kinda experiment the same..my family is also very religious but in the intolerant way! they think gay people are sick and crazy. I’ve been raised in this atmosphere and it’s probably why i escape from them when i was 21.I never been able to find myself around them!now i live in Thailand,second world gay community.they still don’t know WHO i really am, but by seeing me only 1 month every year they start to wonder why i changed so much mentally and physically!and its like with the distance they begin to realize that they’re maybe missing something very important..its still hard to talk to them, the less they know better they feel, but this year i really notice a big change in their attitude.. i’m not saying that you should leave your country to make sure your family will accept you as you are, but sometimes when people who loves you notice that you changed a lot(without any help from them!!), and that makes you actually very happy, THEY START TO WONDER WHAT IS YOUR BIG SECRET! and if by asking themselves the good questions they still don’t get the answer(like my sister did by herself!) they will probably get the guts to ask you when they will be ready to hear it..(like my cousins did..!) i’m pretty sure my mum and dad will open their eyes the same way when they will be ready. of course it wasn’t always easy for me. i think i will still get this double life feeling until all of them will know about it! but i gotta admit that Thai people, culture and way of life help me a lot in all that! i kinda find a new family there who helps me to be more positive in my new life..!
hope that this will help you.. take care and get out! i agree with Dace!

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by balkan girl on November 23rd, 2009 at 10:05 PM