Can a Lesbian and a Bisexual Woman Have a Good Long-Term Relationship?

Mar
2010

Can a Lesbian and a Bisexual Woman Have a Good Long-Term Relationship?

The easiest answer to this question is “Yes.” And yes, there are probably going to be some complications along the way, but isn’t this the same in just about every relationship – lesbian or heterosexual? All relationships have their little ups and downs, and complications arise all the time, no matter who you are.

If you are a lesbian and are finding yourself falling in love with a bisexual woman, her attraction to men could become a complication. Be sure to keep an open line of communication in case she needs to discuss with you any changing feelings she may be having in regard to her sexuality, as there may come a time when she decides she is not getting what she needs from being in a lesbian relationship, and may want to try dating men again. Openly discussing such feelings before it’s too late may help strengthen your relationship.

Of course, even if she is deeply in love with you, she is always going to be attracted to men, and you need to accept this. It is only natural to be attracted to other people when you are in a relationship, and the same goes for you as well. You are going to be attracted to other women. For both of you, the key is simply not to act on this attraction.

There are going to be other complications as well. For instance, many of her friends and family members will probably question her decision to date you, especially if she has never been involved with another woman. The two of you will have to deal with this together and let everyone know that you are in love and serious about your relationship and your commitment to each other.

As long as you are both in love, you are going to be able to build a good, long-term relationship that will fulfill both of you. Yes, she may be bisexual, but if she truly wants to be with you, heart and soul, you need to trust the fact that she loves you and isn’t going to leave you for a man as if you were just an “experiment”. Bisexual or not, true love is a bond that simply cannot be broken.

–Written by Kaylee Larson, owner of LesbianLoveNow.com. Kaylee’s site features dating, romance, and issue-related videos for lesbians, along with numerous on-topic articles.

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Comments

8 Responses to Can a Lesbian and a Bisexual Woman Have a Good Long-Term Relationship?

Very well said – and, it’s no different than if a bisexual woman has a long term relationsip with a heterosexual man. Committed partners will always epxerience attraction for other persons. If communication is open and trust and commitment remain high, this should pose no problem. Plus, some of the time, they can admire the same third party together.

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by Adriana Kraft on March 13th, 2010 at 2:28 PM

I don’t know about this post, the following quote seemed pretty offensive to me:

“there may come a time when she decides she is not getting what she needs from being in a lesbian relationship, and may want to try dating men again”

How is this particular to bisexual women? ALL people may decide they’re not getting what they want from a particular relationship, this is NOT particular to bisexuals.

I think you should have found more of an expert on the topic of bisexual studies (Robin Ochs comes to mind) to have as your guest blogger, and this would have been a much more informative post. OR, what about a bisexual and a lesbian who are in a relationship? This just came off as pretty shallow and that quote was quite offensive.

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by butchmama on March 17th, 2010 at 8:31 PM

Does it say that ALL other people may not decide? Don’t see any issues here…

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by Katie on March 18th, 2010 at 5:10 PM

I have to agree with butchmama on this one. As a closeted bisexual in a lesbian relationship (the metrics of that alone are complicated, trust me), it does suck royal __________ (insert preferred gentalia reference here)to have our sexual attractions labeled in any way as negative. We don’t necessarily swing back and forth between what we want anymore than the next letter of GLBT, so why call that out as a complication WE invoke? To me, the real perpetrators of a so-called “complication” that could arise would be from the lesbian partner. Just my thoughts…..

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by A Nonny Lass on April 1st, 2010 at 3:46 PM

well to me it’s all about understanding ,being that im a bisexual woman who is dating a in the closet lesbian,i told my lady b4 hand that i was bisexual and she still wanted the relationship so i agree with kaylee if we love each other as we say we do we can make it work. yes i have from time to time wanted the feel of a man but that does’nt mean i dont love my lady i love her and if i had to choose i would choose her if she would be willing to come out the closet.

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by MELLOWYELLOW on December 21st, 2010 at 11:13 PM

“Lesbian” is not a throw away word to apply to women who are in a romantic or sexual relationship with a woman.

I am a lesbian even when I am not with a woman.

It is not a “lesbian relationship” if one or neither of the women are lesbians. Just because a woman is in a relationship with a woman doesn’t make her a lesbian. So it is a female-female relationship or same-sex relationship.

Being a lesbian is not about who you are dating sexing at the moment.

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by Salty#1 on December 30th, 2010 at 6:24 AM