thelesbianlifestyle.com

I post reviews of toys shortly after I get them, after using them just a few times. I thought it might be helpful to get an update, a few months down the road, about how some toys are doing with continued “testing.” This just in!

Earth Angel Has Died!

I was organizing stuff and re-found the Earth Angel and decided to give it a crank, only to find… nothing. It doesn’t work anymore. After less than a dozen “uses” it’s dead. I contacted Caden Enterprises who said no, there is no warranty for replacement if it’s been more than 30 days and its been used (they’re no jimmyjane, but hey) and suggested I get an old Nokia phone charger to charge it up with actual electricity. Because, there IS a port to charge but they just don’t ship them with chargers, encouraging y’all to be green.

So, I guess I should buy an old Nokia charger and fire it up, but for now… Earth Angel is dead.

Bad Dragon Dildo Grows Mold

It’s gross, I know. But the one Bad Dragon dildo with the tube grew mold… in the tube. Each time I used the tube (two times) I thoroughly rinsed it with hot soapy water. Yet, as I went sorting things in my bedroom, I uncovered this monstrous silicone dildo with crunchy black mold inside the clear tubing of unknown material.

I sincerely hope none of you have gotten a Bad Dragon product with a tube. If you have, contact the company. I just tossed mine out, though I’ll be contacting them soon.

Carnivale Still Is Gorgeous Inside (my ass) And Outside (in parks)

I’m pleased to be able to report that the glass butt plug I received from Liberator’s Erotic Glassworks continues to be awesome.

Being glass, it’s super slick, so just a small amount of lube goes a long way. It’s a good, smallish size and has a nice shape. I love it. It’s easy to use, safe, and all around just a really good toy.

Plus, it photographs well.

Pricey? Yeah.

However, considering it’s the one toy I can use anytime I wanna do backdoor stuff, I think it’s worth it. Other toys are too much of a challenge for me for all the time.

Flexi Felix Stinks

Inexplicably, Flexi Felix is retaining a bad smell the way rubber or jelly butt toys do. Silicone should NOT retain bodily odors.

Yet, this silicone toy has a bad smell. I don’t share my toys, so have yet to boil or bleach them. I just wash them with hot water, soap, and if need be, rinse with a disinfectant spray we keep on the sink and rinse again with clear water. It takes care of lingering bacterial concerns. However, it looks like I will be forced to use a 10% bleach solution on Felix to see if that helps.

AcuVibe DANGER Mini Bit The Dust

I was SO upset that this was dying! I reviewed the AcuVibe Mini last June, so that means I had it less than a year before it started dying.

It actually started to die in December or January, so I’d had it perhaps 6 – 7 months and it started to hold charge for less time, and then with less intensity, and soon it could only be used for 10 – 15 minutes at a time, and only very weakly.

AcuVibe Mini was survived by its very sad sex toy reviewer who moved on and remarried Form 2.

Tristan’s Giant Plug Crushes Manhattan

Tristan’s Anniversary Plug is still just too big for me.

It’s really well made, it’s a good shape…

… and it’s pretty…

…however, I have yet to use it.

Sigh.

Liberator Throe Saves The Day Again and Again!

This continues to be a worthwhile investment. I haven’t slept on a wet spot since I received this.

I need more of them. I want one in black, and one in leopard. Because, you know, sometimes you need to launder it AND THEN IT’S IN THE LAUNDRY AND CAN’T BE USED.

Clearly, I need a spare.

And so do you, have no doubt about that.

Kama Diva Plug Is Junky

I can’t believe I rated this favorably. Granted, it was a very early review of mine and I had little to compare it to, but still.

Why is it bad?

It’s completely solid and so the base pokes into your cheeks, that’s why.

This kind of flare is one thing on a silicone plug, but on something solid like this? It’s poorly designed. I do not use this toy. At all.

Mia Broke And They Replaced It But I Don’t Use It Anymore Regardless

Yep, Mia broke a while back. The button wouldn’t depress and I couldn’t turn it on.

I contacted LELO, who told me I could choose either color and they’d send me a replacement. I chose the lighter pink for the replacement.

It was good for a while, but when I was introduced to increasingly more powerful clitoral vibrators, my affections strayed from Mia. LELO toys and customer service rock, but I am fickle.